Tuesday, 10 July 2012


Rejection is rejection really, no matter what.

(I know I still haven't continued the Belfast guy story yet. I will. Honestly. I'm just not ready yet. Let's just skip to the end.)

With the most recent guy, like I said previously, I KNEW it couldn't last, that it was impractical, the age difference, the different locations, the fact he worked away. It was finite no matter what. I wish it could have lasted a bit longer, but you can't always get what you want. I know that much with life.

And there's been a lot that's went on since then. In the five or so weeks since whatever it was we had ended, he's still in touch. Albeit only via twitter but sometimes I think maybe we can even be friends. Provided that what I'm taking as banter actually IS banter and not him just being horrible to me. I am going to go for the former though.

But you know what? Regardless of how things turned out or whatever . . . the timing honestly could not have been better. I came home to an ex I had struggled to get over who was no longer in a relationship. And thanks to this new guy . . . thanks to the fact that at this point he was still in my life . . . I was in a stronger position. I didn't start to think maybe me and the ex could get back together. If I had been feeling weak maybe i would have . . . and would ultimately have been hurt. Instead I felt like I had completely moved on.

They do say everything happens for a reason. I don't believe that about a lot of things. But if me and Mich could both have afforded to go abroad . . . if my friend Amy had wanted us to come any other day . . . if we hadn't got that particular ferry that particular day . . . and if he hadn't sneezed when he had and i wasn't programmed to say "bless you" when someone DOES sneeze?

Then I probably would still be fixated on my ex and how miserable I felt over the almost one year wake of our official break-up.

And so, despite any hurt or rejection or anything else I might be feeling . . . I have that to thank the ferry guy for. I got to have a crush, a bit of a holiday fling, some late night texting . . .to put myself in a position I'd never been in before . . . and it got me over my ex once and for all.

And so we go back to the whole the best way to get over a guy is to get under another theory. I still don't believe in that theory whole-heartedly. It's about meeting the RIGHT one to get you over the other. It might not be a long term thing, but in my case it maybe has to be a very certain kind of person, a very certain kind of situation.

The kind of situation where, when it ends, will leave you just upset enough about the fact he was really quite pretty, not to mention young and enthusiastic, rather than the fact that you maybe potentially saw the previous one long term, to once and truly move on from the bond that held you to the previous dude, albeit slightly unwillingly.

So yeah, rejection sucks, and I'm still a wee bit gutted that the ferry guy thing didn't progress . . . but in the end all I can be thankful for is that it made me realise there ARE other guys out there and, just like every other guy I've met in life and every other relationship I've ever started . . . they ALWAYS happen when you least expect it.

Here's to the next unexpected adventure, peeps!


  1. What an awesome attitude :)
    Good for you!

  2. Maybe its more "the best way to get over someone is to be reminded of a different version of life without them" Getting a crush or dating someone new lets you see there is life outside of a breakup.
    Good to hear you are in a good space and enjoying life. :)

  3. BIG GRIN. Plus he sounds hot.

    When are we doing wine? xx

  4. I had a crush on a guy this past semester. Which was totally stupid - because I didn't notice until almost the end that he was wearing a wedding ring! And yet, he flirted with me...all semester long! It really bothered me a lot when I first noticed the ring, but now it's summer and I haven't seen him, so I'm over him.

    Until I see him next semester. lol


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