Wednesday, 4 August 2010


So I'm typing away on my creaky old laptop (it's only four years old, technically, but, like dog years, that makes it about 28 really) since I'm awaiting a new netbook charger, and I'm fairly devoid of inspiration tonight. But I feel like I SHOULD post something because

1) I'm a bit at a loss for anything else to do. Apart from listening to Diana Vicker's album, I've done pretty much nothing else all night.


2) I'll be busy the next few nights so may not have a chance to blog (or it may be drunken babbling that makes no sense.)

ANYHOO . . .

It's been a while since I did a "crazy search terms that lead people to my blog" post. Sadly, this is because mainly my seach terms fall under the "how do I name my blog?" umbrella. (Trust me, folks, I don't know. Look what MINE is called, for Pete's sake!) But occasionally I get some leaning more toward the "wtf?" line.

So let's see if me or my blog bears any relevance to any of THESE search terms . . .

"Fucking my sleeping sister" (Nope. Never done this. And I'm a little disturbed by that one. Scratch that - I'm majorly grossed out!)

"Eat lunch topless" (Only when I'm in my flat alone. And even THEN, I'm more likely to have a top on...)

"You're only as young as you feel, so go feel on someone young" (Okay, you got me on that one. It HAS happened before. You know it. I know it. Let's call a spade a spade here...)

"Are insects a problem in Fuerteventura?" (Yes. Trust me. The only place I collected more mosquito bites was Zante. Speaking of which . . .)

"Naked dancing in Zante" (Nope. I didn't do that. Promise.)

"Lost virginity at Pontins" (Given that I stopped going to Pontins in my teens, and didn't lose my virginity until I was 24, that's CERTAINLY not true!)

"Pee fetish gross" (Agreed. Not that I've ever tried it. Yuck.)

"What is in my beer, I'm hallucinating" (This sounds like something a former flatmate of mine would have said. But she certainly didn't say it on my blog!)

"Why am I not crying after getting dumped" (Well, personally I ALWAYS cry. Not just about getting dumped though. About ANYTHING. Ask pretty much anyone close to me, they'll tell you!)

"Sniffling snot" (My goodness, you mention snot ONCE in a two-and-a-half-year period and look what happens . . .)

"You still look like young 20". (Why, thank you. *blushes*)

And on that note, and feeling ten years younger, I bid you adieu. :)

Had any strange search engine terms lead someone to your blog recently???


  1. I had one the other day that said "Randy rodent fuckfest costume party fears". There are so many questions there my head might explode. Not to mention answers.

  2. I did a post about this 2 weeks ago - seems the Lady Gaga fans really love me :)

  3. I only hallucinated a little bit with the cheap nasty absinthe from Spain! I saw car headlight reflections in the window that weren't there... not that bad.

    That week I stopped drinking was worse (how ironic I've typed that when I've currently got a wikipedia page up in another window with a list of American drinking games...)

    I've had a huge increase in folk coming onto my blog because they've done image searches for hotties whose pictures I've included in posts. Some people evidently doing searches as well for ankle injuries (after my wee broken bone).

    One rather fantastic search led someone to my blog, though... 'extra long dick'. *smirk*

    Still no idea why someone from the U.S. Department of State and someone from Fort Knox keep visiting my blog though!

  4. I have to actually search that, but I'm disturbed that someone actually searched for info on "Fucking My Sleeping Sister" - disturbing on so many levels.

  5. I find that drunken babbling in a blog or twitter amuses me so if you should find yourself near a phone to twitter while drunk... I'll be there to giggle and NOT to remind you about it later!



  6. I've always wanted to know how people find me and although I have both Google Analytics and Webmasters tools...I don't know how to do it!!!!!!!!

  7. You crack me up... love this.

    And I've been updating my blog for what feels like FOREVER but finally all done! And I updated my blog roll and added your blog to it- hooray!

  8. I've seen others post about this. How do you sign up for whatever it is to find out how people find your blog? I wanna get that too. I don't even know what it's called to even google it.

  9. You always have the funniest search terms! :D

    I deleted Google Analytics yonks ago so I have no idea who actually visits my site and how they get there. This is probably a *good* thing! x

  10. My fingers took control in the middle of a terrible drugs experience. They led me here and thank God they did. I'm gonna be coming back. And back. And back.

  11. my tops are always "ass to mouth" "how to get a blow job" and "bozo the clown"

  12. I got really really tanked one night. I woke up with a kidney missing and no underwear and the address to your blog was written across my stomach in bright red lipstick!


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