Saturday, 10 April 2010


Another tale of flat woe, sponsored by moi.

(Yay! Right??? RIGHT???)

So about three weeks ago, I was in my flat and drinking on a Friday night. I probably was up until about 2am, then drifted off to sleep, anticipating a lovely long lie the next day.

Instead I was woken up by a guy FALLING INTO MY ROOM and shouting "Oh shit, sorry!"

(For the record, despite the fact I was half asleep and didn't have my contacts in, I'm fairly certain it was my flatmate's boyfriend. Or a mutual male friend. Whoever it was knew me anyway. So it wasn't a complete stranger!)

It was four in the morning. Or, more appropriately, THE MIDDLE OF THE NIGHT!

I don't really understand how he fell into my room in the first place given that the doors are heavy fire ones and need a fairly good shove, but occasionally my door doesn't close completely over, so perhaps that's what happened. Even then, I'm not sure why someone would fall in my door unless they had been pressed up against it!

So what followed was a rather strange conversation. (But then what else would you expect when a guy you barely knows falls through your door in the middle of the night??? Exactly . . .)

Him: Fuck, I'm so sorry Paula, I just fell in the door. It was a total accident.
Me: (from my bed at the other side in the room, still in the dark) That's okay, don't worry about it. I got a fright, that's all. You woke me up.
Him: Were you sleeping?
Me: Um - yeah!
Him: Are you alone?
Me: Er - yes.
Him: You're not asleep! (accusingly)
Me: (pointedly) I WAS.
Him: Oh come on, it's Friday night, get up and come and have fun.
Me: No, it's okay, I'm tired, I want to come back to sleep.
Him: Are you REALLY alone?
Me: Yes
Him: Come on, get up!
Me: No. I want to sleep now. (sharply)
Him: Oh right, okay. Sorry again. Night!

Door closed.

I lay there for an hour or so, wide awake, wondering if I had just dreamt the whole thing.

Come the next morning, I had a missed call from my flatmate, so I think it definitely happened. It was all a bit random though.

It's an improvement over waking up to find a policeman in my room a la my flatmate B at New Year. But I have been sticking a chair in front of my bedroom door ever since just in case . . .

Also, you may hsve already checked it out but I made myself a little About Me page (hopefully I'll be making a separate and updated blogroll page soon but I am very lazy and that involves a bit more work and possible repetitive strain injury due to copying and pasting A LOT) so go check it out. I'm a bit sad you can't actually comment on it (cos how do I know you read it otherwise!) but feel free to comment on here about it! :)

Who is P?


  1. LOL!!!!
    I love your adventures with the flat people... :)
    I started reading your about page but got interrupted in the middle... and now gotta go to bed... but will read in the morning... :)

  2. What in the world?!?! I would've pissed my pants if that happened to me! And why did he keep asking if you were alone?!? Weird...
    hope your weekend doesn't include any more strange intruders!!

  3. Lol - you and your stories :) Never disappointing! I would just like to be in your shoes one day with all these flatmates haha.

    Just read your about me section - I would live on italian food too :) How's the diet and exercise going for you?! Good I hope. And I'm terrified of bugs too - especially big jumpy ones - sick.

  4. Whaaaaaa? So weird. WEIRD.

  5. It's funny he kept asking if you were with someone ih there, lol.
    BTW, your blogroll.... I kinda am in it but with the old url...*blushes*

  6. OMG! Every time I start to think that moving into a shared place could be a good option I'm going to come back and read this post! :)

  7. Now I want to see pictures of that flat 'pain in the butt' mate of yours. So many story I need to put a face on the girl.

  8. Note to self : google "neds" and "yuppies".:p

    Anyhoo, i'm torn about public drinking. Personally i'd love to enjoy a frozen margarita or flavored beer while sitting around talking but then there are many drunk idiots that are getting more and more annoying when they're drunk.

  9. erm... how can you just "accidentally" fall through a door? My flat doors are just normal ones but you still gotta deliberately push the handle down to open this (yeah, I actually went as far as going up to my door and attempting to accidentally open it. I might be a tad tired & drunk). And what's up with asking whether you had someone in there? Maybe he was wanting a bit of midnight pervyness?


  10. Yeah- I think you were waaay nicer to that random guy than I would have been. I probably would have wound up yelling, "Get the hell out of my room drunkass!!" about the second time he asked if I was alone.

  11. I had two random guys pop into my room before and I believe I cursed at them. You were much nicer than I was.

  12. sort of related...from your about me: "I break down easily but I'm made of sterner stuff than some people think. Just because I show emotion easily doesn't mean I'm not a survivor. In fact, I believe it is my ability to show emotion easily that helps me become a stronger person." - i feel you sister, i definitely do.


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