Sunday, 31 January 2010


I was watching "The Holiday" last night, which is what inspired this post.

If you haven't watched this film (or heard of it), it's about two women (played by Kate Winslet and Cameron Diaz) who effectively trade lives for two weeks.

And so it made me think about what blogger I would like to trade lives with.

I didn't have to think about this answer too hard:

It would HAVE to be Chele.


  • She's GORGEOUS
  • She's hilarious
  • She has had such a fascinating life, met tons of famous people, been part of a girl group, a MTV VJ, a model, a DJ, she's been all over the world . . . could I BE any more jealous? Yet despite all this, she seems totally grounded.
  • She lives somewhere MUCH warmer than Scotland
  • She has a fantastic social life
  • Her boyfriend is HOT!
Enough reasons for ya?

(DISCLAIMER: Don't worry Chele. I am not planning on going all "Single White Female" on your ass. Honest! I can't really WALK in stilettos for a start, let alone use them as weapons . . .)

So, I pose the question . . .

Which blogger would YOU like to switch lives with for two weeks?

Saturday, 30 January 2010


While I was whining to one of my team-mates about the thievery of my Molton Brown bubble bath, he told me a story I feel I should share. Because it cracked me up.

My colleague's wife used to live in a flatshare. She was a little convinced that the flatmate used her stuff when she wasn't in the flat. But had no proof. One day she realised her straighteners weren't there.

(If you are not a girl, you need to pause and think here. THIS IS A BIG DEAL. Girls NEED their straighteners. If we were on a desert island, we would want our straighteners. AND electricity obviously.)

She checked her flatmate's room. Surprise surprise, they were there! She used them and went wherever she was going.

Later on, she saw her flatmate. "Did you borrow my straighteners?" she asked.

The flatmate denied it. (I'm assuming she thought she had replaced the straighteners.)

"But . . ." my colleagues wife said "I found them in your room earlier."

NOW . . . isn't this the point when you realise "Shit, I'm rumbled, I'd better just admit the truth."???

You'd THINK, right?

INSTEAD, the flatmate went "What??? Well . . . I TOLD you this place was haunted!"

What a defence!!!

After that story and all the comments on my previous post, I know I'm not the only one who experiences this crap flatsharing shite. And that makes me happy.

(Not cos I want everyone to be unhappy! Just cos I don't wanna be the only one!)

I read a book a few years ago called "I Lick My Cheese: And Other Notes from the Frontline of Flat-Sharing". It was brilliant. I think many of you who commented on the last post need to check it out - I think you'll appreciate it as much as I did.

In other news . . .

I had a day off today therefore ran into my landlord - I don't see him often these days - and he told me one of my flatmates is moving out tomorrow. Of course, it is one of the few flatmates that I LIKE! (Why would the ANNOYING ones move out, after all!) I'm a bit hurt she never told me, and it's a shame because she was really nice but . . . oh well.

My highlight of yesterday was discovering that the DJ I listened to every weeknight as a child was following me on Twitter. It doesn't sound like a big deal to anyone else, but this dude is like an INSTITUTION where I grew up - we ALL listened to his show. And he added me first! And then he tweeted me! He might have tweeted about five million other people too, but I still felt honoured! (AND he drinks rose wine!)

And in other news . . . Alex Reid (non-celebrity boyfriend of Katie Price aka Jordan) won Celeb BB. Dane Bowers (Jordan's ex from YEARS ago!) came second. I might not like his taste in women, but I like his work . . .

I'm sure that song was aimed at Jordan . . . the girl in the video even LOOKED like her! Hahaha!

And yes, that IS David Beckham's wife aka Posh Spice singing with him, for you non-Brits . . .

So . . . what did you think of the Celeb BB result? And, if you aren't in the UK, share something else! What you up to this weekend? Or . . . share whatever you like! (If you're at a loss, comment on the whole "oooh, it must be a ghost" story. Just remember - I like comments!)

Friday, 29 January 2010


Based on nearly seven years of experience, I feel I can give good advice on this . . . So, to quote Shania Twain, "let's go, girls . . ."

1) Act like you are the only person who lives there
If I'm the only person who lives there, I can be as much of a douche as I want . . .

2) Your music can NEVER be loud enough.
You THINK it's as loud as you can get it? I'm sure you can find supersonic speakers or something that will make it louder. Go on - I know you want to...

3) Dishes WILL wash themselves
Just make sure they are as DIRTY AS POSSIBLE.

4) Door slamming is ESSENTIAL!
Otherise how do people know you're in the flat???

5) Take other people's things.
It might be something they don't notice readily - like a bit of their milk - or something they WILL NOTICE - like a big chunk of their expensive (gift!) Molton Brown bubble bath . . . but whatever it is, you need to make sure you don't put it back where you got it from so the person KNOWS you stole it! (Otherwise where's the fun!)

6) Never buy toilet paper. Because other people will ALWAYS Buy it if you don't. We're all human after all. We ALL have to wipe our asses.

7) Make sure you time your toilet visits with every point you know your flatmate MIGHT POSSIBLY want to go in there. (It's nice to be somewhere that's in demand, right?)

Any other contributions???

Thursday, 28 January 2010


TMI Thursday

Alright, folks, you know the rules. Join us all in humiliating the crap out of yourself every Thursday by sharing some completely tasteless, wholly unclassy, “how many readers can I estrange THIS week??” TMI story about your life. Or hell, about someone else’s!

I was inspired by LiLu's tale last week to recount this particular tale . . .

I am NOT a fan of farting.

My family, on the other hand, ARE

Weirdly enough, the worst culprit is my mum! Back when I was younger, we'd be wandering around the supermarket and suddenly . . . SNIFF! . . . we'd realise there was something yucky-smelling hanging around.

"Do you smell that mum?"

At which point my mum would put on an innocent expression and wander off, leaving us with a decidedly dodgy smell and sudden realisation that the stench was HER doing...

So just before my 30th birthday last October, me and my little sister met up with my mum for lunch in one of our oft-frequented pubs. My mum, while not a vegetarian, is not particularly fond of meat either, so tends to go for the vegetarian option. After spending about half an hour scanning the menu, she opted for the five bean chilli. Although to be fair to her, she provided a disclaimer "You know how beans give me wind."

Thanks Mum.

So we left the pub and headed into the city centre again. As we waited at a light to cross the road, suddenly I caught a whiff of a disgusting smell. I looked at my sister. "Did you smell that?" I asked. Almost in tandem, realisation dawning, we turned to my mum. She was wearing that tell tale expression.

"I TOLD you what beans do to me!" she objected.

"MU-UUUUM!!!" we wailed in unison.

As we wafted the smell away from us, she said "Well it was five bean chilli. That's ONE bean taken care of..."

We couldn't help but laugh at that one.

But by the time we left her, ten minutes later, she only had two beans left to expel.

I pity the other passengers on her train home . . .

Wednesday, 27 January 2010


If it's Wednesday, then it must be time for "Where in The World" Wednesday, hosted by the aptly named Classy in Philadelphia.

This week, my Where in the World Wednesday takes place in the capital city of Ireland . . . DUBLIN!!! :)

Or . . . in a pub!


Someone mentioned last week that I seem to travel quite a lot. I actually haven't travelled very much in terms of my whole life, but in the past few years I've managed to pop to quite a few places. Dublin is somewhere I spent a total of approximately ten hours . . . and most of those were in the pub!!! :)

Me and Mich went over to Northern Ireland in July 2008 to visit our old flatmate A. And while there, we decided to pop down to Dublin for the day. This necessitated an early start, a two hour coach trip across the border, and a keen eye on the time to make sure we caught the last coach back, but it was totally worth it!

This is the pub (one of many in the Temple Bar area) where we spent most of our time. You may be able to tell from my hair in the corner of the pic that it was a somewhat windy day!

Don't expect me to be able to tell you where any of these places are. (possibly Temple Bar again?) By the time we reached the pub I'd already had a drink or two in TGI Fridays (yes, we went all the way to a different country and ended up in a TGIs. Of couse...)

The three of us outside the pub . . .

A's boyfriend arrempting a pole dance while I apparently laugh my head off...

Me and Mich posing in the middle of . . . er, a street in Dublin. (Help????)

We ate loads, drank even more and nearly missed the last bus back to Belfast. I believe Mich had to hold up the driver while I ran to the toilet.

I hope one day I get to go there for MORE than half a day!

(Last chance if you want to vote for me in the Scot Blogs awards. Voting closes at 8pm GMT tonight. If you like me, please go ahead and vote here. I don't believe for a minute I have a chance, but it's nice to look popular and worthy of the nomination!)

Tuesday, 26 January 2010


When did I last do an edition of Cheer-Me-Up Tuesday? I can't even remember but I figured one was long overdue. (I know it's not Tuesday in everyone's world yet, but it already is in some of the world, including my part of it, so . . . THERE!!! Na-na-nana-NA!)

Sorry. Think I'm in a bit of an immature mood today. I'm sleepy, maybe that's why.

Anyway, for the uninitiated, I started CMU Tuesday two years ago because Tuesday is my least favourite day of the week, and I tend to need cheering up more than usual on that particular day. I don't ask anyone to participate (unless you want to!) although I always welcome comments (as comments ALWAYS cheer me up, hint hint) and if you have any links you think might help make me smile, I always appreciate if you share them with me. So . . .

I thought I would share some videos. They may be new to you, you may have seen them before but . . . it'll be fun anyway. Agreed?

Let's start off with some Weird Al stuff . . .

And now one of my favourite scenes from one of my favourite shows:

And from "Spoons" . . .

and another . . .

Hope there was at least one clip you liked in there. And if you have anything to cheer ME up (videos, jokes, pictures!), let me know! ;) I'm anticipating a tough day today (got a LOT to do) and coming home to lots of things to make me laugh is undoubtedly going to be a real treat . . .

(PS Thanks to all of you who voted for me yesterday. I love you. :) If anyone else cares to do so, please pop by here and do the honours...)

Monday, 25 January 2010


I've never really met anyone online in real life. Unless you count the time I ran into Ant on the Glasgow subway.

And in two weeks time, I should be in Manchester meeting several other bloggers and twitterers (tweeters? twits?). I've been a bit nervous about it - read this post if you don't know why. I've done and said silly things when nervous or drunk - like accusing a stranger of being a necrophiliac. Or asking another stranger if she was an escort. When I say something stupid, I go ALL OUT. (That's a guarantee.) So understandably I'm a little bit apprehensive about the whole thing.

ANYWAY, that''s not the point here. Here IS the point...

The other day, I mentioned to a male friend of mine I was going to Manchester. He, of course, asked who I was going with. When I said some girls I knew from the internet, his shock was fairly apparent.

I momentarily wondered if I had accidentally said I was going with a selection of famous murderers from the past, but I knew I wouldn't say something THAT strange. (Mainly because I wasn't drunk!)

He went on about it for the good part of the next 20 minutes, asking me if I had ever met these girls before, did I think it was wise to be going . . . he just couldn't IMAGINE travelling for miles to meet a bunch of people he'd never met in real life before.

I asked if it was any different from internet dating. Or going home to a random person's house for a party you met for the first time while on a night out. Or even going on holiday with a friend you hadn't known for very long.

To me, it seems less harmless than any of those options. He didn't seem to agree though.

I understand that not everyone UNDERSTANDS blogging or what goes on in the blogosphere. Even people who DO blog do it for different reasons - but one of the things I have always loved about it is the connection, the interaction between us. The friendships that form. Sometimes I feel like my readers know me better in certain ways than some of the people I DO know in real life. Surely then the logical next step is to MEET these people?

That's how I see it anyway.

Tons of bloggers who I read on a daily basis have meet ups all the time. Have formed lasting friendships with one another. Hang out at one another's houses. I'm a bit jealous of that. I wish more of you lived closer to me so we could go out to the pub and get drunk and have a gossip and puke on the street together after we are kicked out at closing time. (Too far? Sorry.)

I don't really know what my mate's issue is but I know he's not the only one who has this opinion.

I couldn't disagree more though.

Despite my nerves, I am still pretty excited. My first meet-up!

(I just hope the other girls still want to meet up with me after reading this!)


ONE MORE (MAINLY UNRELATED) THING . . . if you have time (and think I deserve it) I'd appreciate if you pop over to this site and vote for me. Did I mention how good you all look today? No? Well, you do!!! ;)

Sunday, 24 January 2010


  • I think I'm getting old. Because when I actually have a busy social life at the weekend, it tires me out and I need another weekend to recover from it. Thank GOD I have a three day weekend next week to rest and recuperate!
  • I ate a three course meal on Friday night - and didn't even feel full! How weird. Usually my eyes are bigger than my belly. (Metaphorically - not literally!)
  • It REALLY annoys me when you're out to celebrate an occasion for someone and the third person you are with decides that you and she are going to pay for the entire meal since it's the other girl's occasion. I am not trying to be greedy or selfish here but I resent people making that decision for me - especially when I'm struggling with money at the moment!
  • Apparently anyone (of legal age) can get into the casino these days. I've never been to a casino before. I don't know ANYTHING about gambling but the bar did a good line in French Martinis and Bellinis.
  • I managed to leave my mobile at my friend's before we went to the restaurant and was panicking all night that my sister would have tried to get in touch and thought I was dead because I hadn't replied (it's happened before!) By three in the morning I was starting to get more upset than panicky (probably due to my drunken state) so my friend said we should go back to her flat. It was there. And my sister hadn't even been in contact after all that!
  • I spent last night over at my sister's having a girly night in. We watched "The Proposal" and I fell in love with Ryan Reynolds all over again. I can't believe that damn Scarlett J stole him from me! (Bitch). I also really wanted the little white dog. What an awesome film. Liked it far more than "The Hangover" - by the time I got around to watching that it was so hyped up by everyone I knew that it actually was a bit of a letdown. "The Proposal" on the other hand, was absolutely fantastic, and far better than I expected!
  • I drank what feels like the output of an entire vineyard this weekend. Think I should give my liver a break for the next week or so.
  • I've been up since half eight this morning since my sister was working. This is the earliest I've been up on a Sunday for god knows how long.
  • I am absolutely FREEZING!!!
  • Oh . . . and it looks like I'm going to be a bridesmaid for the first time!!! Wheeeee!!!

So that was MY weekend. How was yours???

Friday, 22 January 2010


(Firstly, this is going to be a bit of a rant and for that I apologise profusely. Or maybe you realise I am a serial ranter and won't mind. But before I start I just wanted to thank you all for your music recommendations yesterday and I will definitely be checking them all out - I'll keep you updated on what ones stick with me! Okay, now that's out the way, let's get ranting...)

Obviously, I've already covered some flatshare-related issues that have been niggling at me recently. The toilet paper issue - that was a big one. And the (same) loud flatmate. Another biggie.

The toilet paper issue has MAINLY been resolved for now. But only because one of my friends took me shopping and I bought a big pack of it, which we stash in our little kitchen so no one knows how much we have, and bring out one roll at a time as needed. The noise issue . . . it's still ongoing.

Not only is it LOUD, but there has been a recent trend for door-slamming. I mentioned this before but it's got WORSE!!! Now, I'm ALL for a door-slam or two when it's to prove a point in an argument. But this is virtually ALL THE TIME!!! It's not even the NOISE of the door-slamming that bothers me. It's the fact that the wall shakes and, since my bed is next to the wall, and I spend a lot of time on my bed (because I'm lazy, not cos I'm like a whore or anything like that! If only...), this means that PAULA shakes too. (I don't really like it when the earth moves in a BAD way...) It tends to only happen when The Boyfriend is here, which makes me think it's HIM who is the culprit - but that makes it even worse. Hogs the toilet (she was moaning at him to get out of there the other night AGAIN - seriously what DOES he do in there? Yoga? Meditation? A really massive DUMP???) AND slams the door??? He seems a nice enough guy but come ON - a bit of fucking consideration for others wouldn't go amiss!

Okay, so my NEXT little gripe. The bathroom lightbulb conked out over the weekend. This would have been fine if I'd been planning on going outside that weekend. I would have had no problem picking up a lightbulb somewhere. But I wasn't. On the other hand, other flatmates were quite clearly in and out of the flat and could have easily picked up a bulb. Did they? Er - that would be a no. No problem. I took my phone to the loo with me so I could use it as a light, and made sure I showered on Sunday during the day because no chance was I showering in the dark. No chance to get a bulb on Monday as I met up with friends after work and didn't get home til eleven pm. Got home and there was still no light. I was meeting Mich on Tuesday after work and wasn't sure when I would get home - but I guess I had a feeling that once again no one would bother their arse to get a new lightbulb. Apart from Paula the Walkover. Which is why me and Mich ended up in Somerfield in the city centre shortly before ten so I could buy a lightbulb. Not just a lightbulb. An ENERGY SAVING LIGHTBULB because if I bought a normal one, you can guarantee that my landlord would just so happen to pay a visit the next day and replace it anyway, thus rendering me spending any money pointless.

So I got home, drunkenly changed the lightbulb (thankfully the ceiling in that bathroom isn't as high as the ceilings in the rest of the flat!) and that was that.

Although part of me resentfully thought "Why did I have to be the one to do it? Couldn't anyone else have at least THOUGHT about doing it?"

The next night when I got home, there did not appear to be a soul in the flat . . . BUT SOME FUCKER HAD LEFT THAT BATHROOM LIGHT ON. WASTING MY MONEY!!!

(I have rage issues, clearly! But COME ON!!!)

Next issue. The MORON who keeps leaving the window in the other kitchen open. WIDE OPEN. Not merely ajar. A PLUS-SIZE BIRD OF PREY could get in with no problems, that how bloody wide open it is.

It. Is. January.


In Scotland!!!


Come on, it's not like we're renowned for having warm weather!

I cannot actually put into words how INSANE this is!!!

I love my flatshare. I love its location (the west end of Glasgow was a place I always wanted to live since my student days and I don't regret moving to the area at all), I love my room. I've had worse flatmates in the six and a half years I've lived here. (I've had far BETTER ones too though!) I wouldn't have stayed here all this time if I didn't like it. (I'm not THAT lazy.) But when shit like this happens . . . I just wish I had a plentiful savings account, could put down a sizeable deposit on a flat and get the hell out of there. Buying a place terrifies me, but the idea of things actually being my OWN . . . that's tempting. I wouldn't have to cope with anyone else's mess, anyone else's selfishness . . . I wouldn't need to worry about running into random strangers in the hall, of my landlord coming around and trying to talk to me when I'm in the bath, of my flatmate drunkenly splitting her head open in the middle of the night then deciding to get drunk while she is concussed and under my care, of the possibility that the police might turn up again and appear in the middle of MY room in the middle of the night next time . . .

Life might not be as interesting to BLOG about, but it certainly would be a bit easier on my stress and/or rage levels . . .

Thursday, 21 January 2010


If you have managed to miss the awesome Love Harder campaign (like me, who chose yesterday and today to be stressing out over their new walkman and the fact they couldn't download anything!) please go check it out here.

It never fails to amaze me how much the blogosphere is there for someone in need and this just proves it.

The quandry: We feel terrible. Just horrible. And oh so helpless… if only there was something we could DO for them.

The answer: Ummmm. Did you forget that WE ARE THE INTERNET?!?!!??! And also, Yes We Can!!!

The result: Brandy and your Hot Awesome Dude… this one’s for you. Love, The Internet.

Our Plea

Our friend Brandy is a brilliant writer, a wonderful teacher, and a generous friend. And she is in love with a man who has just been diagnosed with multiple myeloma. We are raising money for the Multiple Myeloma Research Fund in his name. For the price of a cinnamon dolce latte, half-caf, hold the whip, you can be part of an effort to cure a disease that affects approximately 750,000 people worldwide.

Every dollar brings us a dollar closer to a cure. And every donation brings a sliver of hope to a girl who needs all the hope she can get.

Love Harder.

What You Can Do
  • Give. Be part of a worldwide effort to cure a disease that affects approximately 750,000 people worldwide. Every dollar helps.
  • Pass it on. Forward this story to five people. Share this blog post. Become our fan on Facebook.
  • Love harder. Life is short, love is unbending, and no one knows what could happen next. Tell someone you love them today.
Where Your Money Goes
  • The American Institute of Philanthropy recently named The Multiple Myeloma Research Foundation one of the best organizations to give to in terms of their accountability and use of resources.
  • By working closely with researchers, clinicians and partners in the biotech and pharmaceutical industry, the MMRF has helped bring multiple myeloma patients four new treatments that are extending lives around the globe.
  • The MMRF has advanced twenty Phase I and Phase II clinical trials. They need your support to advance these clinical research programs and accelerate the development of better, more effective treatments.
  • The MMRF’s Multiple Myeloma Genomics Initiative recently became the first to sequence the multiple myeloma whole genome in its entirety.
  • A whopping 98% of your donation to the MMRF will be used immediately to support high-priority multiple myeloma research.
  • With diminishing funding for early stage drug development and the next myeloma treatments not expected to be approved until 2011, the MMRF desperately needs your help.

Anyone who has never understood people befriending one another on the internet, or the blogosphere, I present you the exact reason why we invest ourselves in this. We CARE about the people we "bump" into in here on a daily basis.

I'm the worst Catholic in the world, but Brandy and her man continue to be in my sporadic prayers.

If you can help out, be inspired and do so.

PS I should add, I HAVEN'T done so yet, but I will! This is my first step, but I WILL donate.

ON MUSIC . . .

I love music.

(Who doesn't?)

I HATE music snobs.

You know, the Judgey McJudgersons who think only THEIR taste counts???

Most of them slag off my taste in music.

I don't think MY taste in music is that bad. It's fairly eclectic. I like r&b, pop, some rock, some indie stuff . . . I'm all over the place. I mean . . . here is a random selection of my favourite artists


See? Loads of stuff. Only people I'm against as a matter of principle? Westlife (because every song sounds the same.) Coldplay (because they bore me senseless as a rule - although I will admit they have two songs I don't mind, so I'm not afraid to admit when I'm wrong!) And Take That - because I don't think a boy band should reunite ten years after their heyday because they're now a MAN BAND and that's just sad.

But I don't judge people for liking them. (Unless the people in question ALREADY annoy me for other reasons; then it's just another excuse!)

I'm thinking about music tonight because I bought a new Walkman the other day (for some reason I've always taken against Apple as a brand and therefore I like to go for the Sony option instead - one day I might give in and buy an iPod but for the moment, the Walkman is my MP3 player of choice). Anyway, the other week the volume button on my walkman of three years randomly fell off so I felt I should maybe upgrade. Bought a fab one online (isn't it pretty???) and have only had a chance to look at it tonight.

(Currently tearing my hair out over it, as a matter of fact, as I can't for the life of me work out how to find my music on my laptop to upload it, since it uses different software from my previous one. Grrr!!!)

I also ordered some CDs to upload onto it. Well, that wasn't the intention. I went online to order Kelly Clarkson's newest album, since I am seeing her for the second time next month and I don't actually know any of her newer songs apart from the single releases. The shame!!! It was a mere five pounds, but then I randomly decided to also buy Timbaland's "Shock Value II" and Lady Gaga's album (since I never got around to that). So I ended up spending 25 quid in the end. Oops.

Looking forward to getting them though, especially the Timbaland one. I LOVED his last album.

Anyway, I wanted to know about YOUR favourite music. I like to check out other people's faves, sometimes I end up finding new favourites of my own. Dragonette, for example, became a big band for me after I read about it on Jessica Maria's blog back in 2008. And I also bought Mandy Moore's latest album "Amanda Leigh" after reading positive comments on it from both her and Angela. And I love this also, much to my surprise!

So share your favourite artists with me, especially ones who aren't as well known . . . and perhaps I'll find some new sounds to listen to myself!!!

Please??? ;)

Wednesday, 20 January 2010


And it's "Where in The World Wednesday" time!!! Check out Jessica's blog for other posts on this subject!

Back in 2008, me and my friend D booked a long weekend to Barcelona for the beginning of August. It's the first time I had ever been to Barcelona and I loved it there - I hope to go back one day and it's not like it's that far away from me - it's a 3 hour flight so it's easy to get to.

It was also fantastically warm! And we all know I like good weather. :)

Taken while on the bus tour of Barcelona.

Taking in the nightlife in a restaurant called Navarra, which was near La Ramblas.

Look!!! Mr Heckles is in Barcelona! But I thought he died???

Posing on the balcony of our hotel, The HCC Taber. Fairly basic but really nice. :)

In another restaurant, this time ON La Ramblas, called Nuria. For some reason we found it really hard to choose restaurants at night time so we ended up here twice!

Our last day. We were heading back at night so had to check out at lunchtime and were wandering about looking for somewhere to hide from the extreme sunshine. We finally found an Irish pub to hang out in, but look how pink I am from the heat!

Me posing outside our hotel. For some reason, I was getting some strange looks!

La Sagrada Familia, a famous piece of Gaudi architecture. There's a lot of famous and beautiful Gaudi architecture, but this is the most beautiful, despite the fact it's still to be completed.

I can't remember what the name of this building was but it was a 2 minute walk from our hotel and very pretty(and another Gaudi piece of architecture!) so I had to snap a picture. Can anyone help out?

Oh and this was the view from our balcony. Yup - a sex shop!!! To be honest, it provided me with much entertainment. I liked to sit out on the balcony in the afternoon and sunbathe (because it was a tiny balcony I used to take up the whole space - luckily my friend doesn't like sunshine much) and would watch the strangest people going into the shop. Like OAPs. (THAT was unexpected). It was open til late too, so at night after we got back to the hotel we would sit out watching the nighttime visitors while sipping from mini bottles of cava. One night I even ended up passing out half on the balcony, half on the bedroom floor. Oops.

Next week . . . we go to the land of the leprechauns!!! ;)

PS If you have any spare funds that you can donate, please consider putting some towards the people in Haiti. You can donate here.

Monday, 18 January 2010



My name is Paula and I am . . .

. . . a pen-chewer.


I know, I KNOW! It's kinda disgusting. I can't help it though!

Give me a new pen and within a day or two the end of it is utterly mangled by my teeth. The thing is, I don't even realise I'm DOING it most of the time!

It's so bad that my boss actually sent me an email the other day politely asking me to stop because the noise was distracting him!!!

Yep, not only do I have this gross habit, I can't even do it quietly!!!

Even after I was told to stop it, I kept doing it again unconsciously, realising it and dropping the pen, looking around self-consciously to see if anyone had noticed.

It's definitely my worst bad habit. I know that for a fact.

Bad habits? Anyone? Feel free to share . . . :)

Sunday, 17 January 2010


Anyone who reads my blog, even on a semi-regular basis, knows what my MAIN weakness is . . .

. . . rose wine, of course!

Amazingly, I don't get hangovers all that often but when I do, I want to die. (Drama queen? Moi? Um - yeah!) And when I'm truly hungover, I can't DO painkillers - they kick my gag reflex into play and let's face it, if you haven't actually manage to DIGEST the pill, it's more than likely not going to work. So I've formed a few ways to try and ease the pain a bit. My hangover cures are as follows:

  • Can of full-fat Coca Cola. I don't keep this in the flat often as I try not to drink the full fat stuff despite loving it, so generally I can only have this if I had the sense the night before to buy a can (or two) of it. Anyway, I find the seven spoonfuls of sugar helps me!
  • Can of Diet Irn Bru. This is more likely since I DO keep this into the house. But it has to be ultra cold, or it doesn't work.
  • Fruit flavoured ice lolly. I don't know why this works so well but it really does.
  • Beroca - it's meant to be multi-vitamins but somehow it makes things feel a bit better when too much alcohol was swallowed the night before.
  • Toasted cheese or French toast - It's the stodge. Soaks up the alcohol.
  • Buttered roll with sausage and potato scone. As before. It's amazing how much the grease helps...
One thing I CAN'T do? Hair of the dog. When I have a heavy hangover, the SMELL of alcohol makes me gag. In fact, so does the SMELL of it. I don't know how people can do it!

Some people have far stranger hangover preventions/cures than I do.

Rubbing half a lemon under your armpit???
Burying a person in moist river sand???
Drinking orange juice with a raw egg in it??? (vom.)
Eating bull's penis? (Er - I wouldn't even be putting a HUMAN one in my mouth when I'm hungover. Gag reflex remember?)

and the most ridiculous of all???


Um . . . that one ain't happening, dude!

So what's YOUR hangover cure? What helps you the morning after?

Saturday, 16 January 2010


This afternoon, me and three of my male colleagues were involved in an incredibly banal but unbelievably crucial task for work. As we sat cross-legged on the floor in the middle of the office, surrounded by piles of paperwork, conversation turned to films. And then Angelina Jolie was mentioned . . .

The sharp exhaled sigh of disgust from me had the dudes turning to me in interest.

"Not a fan then?" one of them asked me in amusement.

Um . . . understatement of the CENTURY. I have been firmly in the Team Aniston camp for a long time now. If Angelina existed in my own life, I wouldn't trust the girl as far as I could throw her. Jennifer Aniston, on the other hand, would be my friend. (What do you mean "what if she doesn't WANT to be your friend?" She just WOULD, okay? For one thing standing next to me she can look even thinner and her hair will look even glossier and beautiful in comparison. It's okay - I'm not bitter; she has a bigger chin than me. AND she's ten years older than me. Ha.) When Jennifer is featured in magazines looking depressed, or having dropped tons of weight, I want to give her a hug. On the other hand, when magazines talk about Angelina losing so much weight she is under 100 pounds I wonder would she smash if I drop-kicked her, and imagine her as a pouty pile of bones.

(Yes, I'm evil.)

So I agreed that indeed, I was not a fan. And in answer to his next question, yes, why I DO like Jennifer Aniston. He asked why. I explained it was female solidarity and all that - Angelina steals men (let's face it, Brad wasn't the first one she stole!) and Jennifer has nice hai . . . I mean, seems like a nicer person.

My colleague then decided to try and guess what female celebrities I liked and did not like, based on his opinion that there are certain celebrities that pretty much ALL girls like, and celebrities that girls generally universally hate!

I felt he did have a bit of a point, so I agreed to play along. Plus it made being stuck in the office until four pm a TAD easier...

So how did he do?

Let's find out...

His guess: Hate. "Most girls do."
Answer: Correct. I'd like to punch her. I've made no secret of this fact.
My other colleagues' reactions: Paula's jealous!!! (Only of the fact she took my soulmate, Ryan Reynolds, away from me, 'kay???)

His guess: Hate
Answer: Wrong. With the exception of her dodgy taste in men (Old Man Douglas, John Leslie etc), I have nothing against her.
My other colleagues' reactions: Michael Douglas is a lucky (OLD) man...

His guess: It could go either way
Answer: Well THAT was a cop-out. But for the record, I LIKE Jessica Alba. Mainly just because I loved her in "Dark Angel".
Other reactions: She can't act. (MY reaction to that comment: Does that MATTER when she looks that damn hot???)

His guess: Hates
Answer: Damn right I do. "She just is unbelievably conceited and that's why I don't like her," I explained.
Other reactions: She can't act. (I wasn't even going to stick up for this one so i kept schtum.)

JORDAN (page 3 model, "author", slutbag whoreface)
His guess: Hates
Answer: Spot on. (Didn't you guess that from my description of who she is? No???)
(I can't remember if there was any other reactions to that one.)

His guess: Likes "Every girl likes her".
His answer: Of course I like her. What's not to like? Despite the fact she broke Michael Vartan's heart, I bet she did it in a nicer way than most people would. Plus she can kick ass!
Other reactions: Who??? (MY reaction to that comment: Are you KIDDING???)

CHERYL COLE ("Girls Aloud"/X-Factor judge/WAG)
His guess: Hate
His answer: Was wrong. I don't mind her. I USED to hate her. Now I think she's okay.
Other reactions: She's a CHAV! (True. But a good looking one.)

So I guess he did well - but then perhaps I'm just too predictable?

I want to point out though that in none of these cases is my hatred motivated by jealousy. I'm fully prepared to admit when a girl is attractive. And I wouldn't be jealous of someone JUST for being attractive. At least not in a SPITEFUL way.

I don't think guys get that sometimes it's not jealousy of a pretty woman that makes us hate them; it's just the fact that they seem like an utter tosspot.

(There's a lesson for you, guys!)

Anyway, here's today's "assignment".

GIRLS - in your opinion, which female celebrities are universally loved by other females, and which are hated?
GUYS - in your opinion, which female celebrities are universally loved by other females, and which are hated?

Oh . . . that was the same question. Oops.

But I'm interested to see how much the answers match up...

Friday, 15 January 2010


So let me begin Friday by asking a question: If you use the loo in work, do you lock your cubicle??? Makes sense, right?

Just wondering because when I popped into the toilet on my way out this afternoon, I walked in on some girl who had FAILED to lock the toilet cubicle she was hanging out in. Nice. She was standing up, so not ENTIRELY sure what she was doing, but I wasn't happy at all because the very act of walking into an already occupied cubicle is embarrassing and I hate to be embarrassed. Particularly since it was HER fault she hadn't locked the door.

In addition, it was just lucky I didn't THROW the door open the way I usually do, because she would more than likely have been knocked unconscious by the force of it.

(Therefore ANOTHER reason to lock the door, APART from for reasons of public decency...)

ANYHOO . . .

I was lucky enough to get paid today so decided a bit of retail therapy was on the cards after work. So, trying to put the toilet trauma behind me, I headed into the city centre.

Where I quickly remembered The Rule of Shopping - YOU ONLY EVER FIND STUFF YOU LIKE WHEN YOU HAVE NO MONEY!!! (At least it is The Rule of Shopping to me. Therefore retail therapy doesn't really work, I'm afraid.) However, just as I was about to give up and go home, empty handed, I struck gold in my final two shops...

So here are my purchases. What do you think?

I love me some quirky hair accessories and these fit the bill precisely . . .

I love this hair clip too, but I can't help but wonder . . . does it look like an emerald-encrusted spider has set up camp in my hair? (Oh screw it, I love it anyway!)

Who can resist a Mickey and Minnie top? I didn't even know it was something I had to HAVE until I spotted it. Then I could think of nothing else! The rock chick top behind it is pretty cute too, but it's outshone by M & M, for sure!

Some pretty bling for me! I particularly love the sparkly bow necklace. Even the shop assistant commented on how pretty it was...

Leather gloves. Aren't they gorge. And I was fully planning to pay the full price of 22 pounds sterling for them - but when I got up to the check out, I discovered that they were in fact reduced to a mere six pounds! SIX POUNDS!!! GENUINE LEATHER GLOVES!!! SO PRETTY!!!

Perhaps for once retail therapy actually DID work for me???

Thursday, 14 January 2010


TMI Thursday

Alright, folks, you know the rules. Join us all in humiliating the crap out of yourself every Thursday by sharing some completely tasteless, wholly unclassy, “how many readers can I estrange THIS week??” TMI story about your life. Or hell, about someone else’s!

So . . . I have a bit of a problem (and, no it doesn't involve an itch, or a rash, or anything particularly TMI, although I feel like I put on so much weight over Christmas that if I showed you a naked picture of myself then THAT would be TMI. Relax. I'm not gonna.) I have ran out of inspiration for TMI Thursday.

PERSONAL inspiration anyway.

So here's just a generalised one. About people and some of the strange things that make their "getting busy" thang so much more fun.

NUMBER ONE (no pun intended!!!)?

Remember that infamous episode of "Sex and the City" . . .

. . . where the politician asked Carrie to PEE on him??? (around about 5.00 into the clip above)

I think it was the fact he wanted them to both get CLEAN first that freaked me out. Yes, let's get clean and then why don't you PEE ON ME??? How does someone discover they LIKE something like that??? Actually, i don't even WANT to know...

Peeing is such a private thing. I make no secret (ironically) of the fact that I'm pee-shy. I don't even feel comfortable having someone HEAR me pee. I'm not going to let them watch me . . . while I do it on THEM. Or vice versa.

It's disgusting!

Sooooo not right.

Agree? Disagree?

(Oh and don't even get me STARTED on Cleveland Steamers...)

Wednesday, 13 January 2010


So it's Wednesday, so we all know what that means, right?

It's "Where in the World" Wednesday time, brainchild of the fabulous Jessica from Classy in Philadelphia.

So where am I today?

I've been on a boat trip. :)

I know I already did Lanzarote two weeks ago and these pictures come from that same holiday but none of them are taken IN Lanzarote itself. We went on a three island trip which took in Lanzarote (obviously!), Fuerteventura and the little uninhabited island and nature reserve of the Isla de Los Lobos, 2km off the coast of Fuerteventura.

I was dying to go to Lobos when we went to Fuerteventura in 2006 but we somehow didn't get around to it, although we did get a boat named the Princessa Ico over to Lanzarote. So when we were in Lanzarote in October 2007 and saw the same boat offering this trip, we decided to do it.

That little figure in the middle is moi, standing in la Hoya de Las Lagunitas (The Valley of the Little Lagoons). The lagoons are beautiful, very shallow so you can wade around in them. Although annoying people in boats get in the way (case in point is illustrated in this picture!)

(I was sooo much skinnier two years ago...)

A very unflattering second picture of me at the lagoons. The weather was absolutely beautiful that day.

The beach on Lobos (Playa de la Concha) is also beautiful (I didn't get a picture of that though, sadly). Because it's in a cove, the water is just completely calm, and sheltered from the main part of the channel between Fuerteventura and Lobos, which is extremely choppy. There's also MontaƱa La Caldera (the aptly named Cauldron Mountain) which is a volcano - well, half a volcano. The other half fell into the sea - well, so the tour guide told us. Maybe he was talking crap. You can walk up there but . . . well, that sounded like too much effort for us...

This is me on the beach on Corralejo, in Fuerteventura. We were there before we went to Lobos. Like the rolls of fat???? :) (Note to self: do NOT allow pictures to be taken while sitting down wearing a bikini)

(Note to you guys: if you ever DO go to Fuerteventura, make sure and check out the sand dunes in Corralejo - they're awesome. And the beaches in surfer's paradise El Cotillo - wow!)

(Another mental note to self - do a proper WITW Wednesday post on Fuerteventura - but maybe not for a couple of weeks, I'm all Canary'd out right now...)

And last but not least, me on the boat back from Fuerteventura to Lanzarote. This was the fourth boat journey of the day and I was feeling decidedly icky by this point. Which was a shame because generally I LOVE going on boats.

Anyway, that's my contribution to WITWW for the week. Hope you enjoyed, and check out Jessica's blog for more participants!

ANNNDDDD . . . while you're there . . . she is also hosting her very first giveaway. Check this post out for details! It'll be worth it. :)

Tuesday, 12 January 2010


So over the weekend, I was reading this book called "It's Not Me, It's You" - it is essentially a self help book about dealing with break-ups, but rather than spouting lots of self-visualisation crap and so on, it actually is a fairly matter-of-fact font of advice with humorous accounts of loads of people who have been dumped. There was some ridiculous stories in there. I think it's meant to make people realise that they're not the only ones who have been there.

By the way, I know it's been quite a few months since I've been dumped but it looked like an amusing book.

And I'm sure NEXT time I'm dumped it will come in handy.

That sounds very defeatist of me, doesn't it? But in most of my relationships I have been the dumpee. It was only my very first relationship where I got to do the dumping. I'm not sure why this is. I can't explain the way the minds of the guys I've been involved with work.

(If I could I would probably be far more successful with guys.)

Let's consider the evidence . . .

There was the guy who decided to stop coming to work and then just never called again, finally getting one of his friends to tell me it was over. The guy who told me he loved me and then within a couple of months dumped me because he wanted to be on his own - he was with someone else within a few months (and still IS with her, as far as I know.) The guy who told me he just didn't want a relationship (recurring theme?) and was on within a matter of days, as far as I can see (and when I confronted him about it, told me he was just looking for friends!). F, who arranged a date with me one night then didn't contact me for a week, finally texting to say I was looking for too much from him and he couldn't commit (considering we had been on nine dates in six months, I don't think I was looking for too much!). Then the guy from the Hallowe'en party who went on one date with me then headed straight back to the ex.

Great track record, huh?

I've said before that I do feel that I am better off single. I'll say it again. I like my own company. I like having freedom to do what I want to do. I can't really imagine ever living with a guy.

Reading that book too . . . well, it re-confirmed that for me. I read stories of girls that thought everything was fine one minute and then the next . . . it was over. No explanation. No apology, Just - The End. I was appalled at some of the accounts I read. It made me wonder if I could ever trust ANYONE again. Especially when I look back at my own experience.

I've spent most of my life single. I've spent three out of thirty years in relationships and, looking back at that time, I wouldn't say any of them were particularly GOOD relationships.

Maybe 2010 will be my year. Maybe my soulmate will miraculously appear. Maybe not.

I like to think I will eventually meet someone that is worthy. I actually think I have a lot to offer a guy. But I don't really want to waste my time in that eternal cycle of getting involved with someone, getting attached, getting dumped and then having to spend time getting over it. It's just too emotionally exhausting!

So . . . that's it really. I just felt like getting all that off my chest. In the meantime, here's to being a happy, healthy singleton!

What about you guys? Single? Attached? Happy? Unhappy?

I'd love to know . . . :)

Monday, 11 January 2010


I've been told on many occasions that I have pretty eyes. At the risk of sounding narcissistic (which I suppose I am, so maybe it doesn't matter if I sound it!), I have to agree. I think my eyes are my best feature. (Yes, I DO have two, although the above picture may have you thinking "Is she Cyclops???")

The problem is that they don't work!

They're crap.

Like I mentioned in my post yesterday I've been short sighted since before I even hit my teens. My mum and dad are both short sighted too, so I guess it was always on the cards (my brother is also short sighted and the only one in the family who escaped it appears to be my sister). And I'm not that kind of short sighted where I can actually see pretty well uncorrected. I actually can't see clearly more than a few inches away from my face. I can function around my flat okay, if I'm just sitting reading or something, it's not an issue. But the TV is a blur, and as for going out of the flat without my contacts in . . . it's just not a consideration.

Not being able to see clearly is something I find unbelievably frustrating. I don't particularly suit glasses either so when I'm tired sometimes my eyes end up dry and irritated from the contacts and there's not much I can do about it, apart from mainline eye-drops.

Sometimes I really wish I could wake up and have perfect eyesight. Unfortunately, the only times that ever happens is when I accidentally fall asleep with my contact lenses in.

(Which happens fairly regularly and never fails to disappoint me...)

I sometimes think about laser eye surgery but the thing is that, despite sticking plastic discs in my eyes for the past seventeen years, I am actually incredibly squeamish about eye-related things. Even trying to read people's accounts of their own experience of the procedure freaks me out and I usually have to stop halfway through. If I can't even READ about it, how could I get it DONE to me?

But then how good would it be to be able to open my eyes one morning and be able to see absolutely EVERYTHING? And know it WASN'T because I simply had drank too much the night before and not taken out my lenses?


That WOULD be incredible . . .

Sunday, 10 January 2010


I was lying in bed this morning with one of those hangovers where you have a thudding headache and want to sleep but can't. All you can do is lie there and think. So for some unknown reason I started thinking about inventions - the things I'm really glad WERE invented. If they HADN'T been invented, I probably wouldn't miss them. But now if they disappeared overnight . . . boy, would I notice!

So here's my list:

Rose wine - what would I be without that? (SOBER, presumably . . .)

Microwave - I prefer to use the oven to cook things but find the microwave ideal for defrosting stuff quickly. I can't leave something out all day to defrost because if I do, I tend to find I don't actually WANT whatever I've defrosted by the time I get home. How the heck am I SUPPOSED to know what I want to eat ten hours later?

GHD straighteners - actually mine aren't GHDs, they're imitation ones which aren't quite as good. But without them, my naturally wavy hair would be a giant frizzy birds nest, so if they vanished out of my life . . . I would exactly be the prettiest of pictures, put it that way!

Television - how would we watch DVDs, play computer games, or simply catch up on the latest episode of How I Met Your Mother if that didn't exist. Plus who would we drool over - no television means fewer actors after all . . .

Contact lenses - since I've been short sighted since I was about seven or eight and have an aversion to wearing glasses, I'd be walking around in a blur right now if these hadn't been invented!

MP3 Players - since I got my Sony Walkman, I hardly actually buy CDs anymore, which saves me some money! It's weird to think that when I was a kid it was CDs that were the latest thing and my friends in school were still buying records and transferring them onto cassette tape for me - our ideal present for Christmas were blank cassette tapes so we could record our favourite songs from the Top 40 off the radio! And now you can just decide on a tune you like, find it online and instantly download it! Did I think that would be possible 20 years ago? No I did not!

The Internet - a random question pops into my head and straight away I'm on google - instant gratification as I can get the answer straight away.

Diet Irn Bru - without it, I would be thirsty a lot.

So there's my list. Obviously there's more obvious things, like the kitchen sink, or the toilet or . . . DOORS, I suppose (otherwise I'd either have a gaping hole in my room, be stuck here forever, or having to enter and exit through my first floor window) but this is more about "luxury items" than anything else.

What inventions are YOU most thankful for?

Saturday, 9 January 2010



I have no intention of leaving the flat again until Monday when duty calls and I have to go back to the office and admin my ass off. Especially since it snowed again between me getting home at 10:30pm last night and me going to bed at approximately 2.30pm . . .

So I've assembled myself some necessities:

  • tons of junk food. I has pizza (a FEW pizzas in fact). A random tex-mex selection from Asda complete with dip. Chocolate still left over from Christmas.
  • Diet Irn Bru AND Diet Pepsi. Cos I may be on a I'm-holed-up-in-minus-temperatures binge but that doesn't mean I can't still PRETEND that I'm on a diet.
  • Rose wine. 1 bottle of fizzy and one of not-so-fizzy. It will do me. I don't intend to drink tomorrow.
  • Numerous dvds I haven't watched. And numerous ones I HAVE watched. Five million times over. More likely than not, I'll end up watching the latter...
  • Tons of books. A girl can NEVER have too much reading material. (Plus I've just opened a package I assumed only had ONE book in it to discover it actually had THREE in there. So that's on top of the 20 at least books I still have to read that are sitting around me.
  • Comfy pyjamas.
  • Heating on continuous. (Our landlord will probably KILL us but hey, our rent includes gas and elec all year around - and in summer do we NEED gas? Er - no. It all breaks even in the end).
  • Electric blanket switched on
  • Tons of scented candles - they not only make a room SMELL nice, they also heat it up. Result!
  • The internet. As long as I have my netbook (and my worn out laptop, just in case) life is good. I will need to dedicate part of my day tomorrow to downloading some tracks I'm enjoying.

Weirdly, much as I love Nelly Furtado, I actually prefer the extended version without her (it's on Timbaland's official website). And anyone else think SoShy looks very like Angelina "Man-Stealer-Extraordinaire" Jolie? (She even has the tattooed thing going on...)

So cheesy but also a great song all the same. And is it just me that thinks Katy Perry is absolutely stunning? If I looked like her (and didn't have to shag Russell Brand) I would be happy.

And this one will prove I can admit when I'm wrong...

Two years ago on my previous blog I slagged this song off, and the British public, for making it number one. Now I can appreciate its appeal - in a cheesy "Oh my god" way. And also I kinda want Jonas aka Basshunter to do well in Celebrity Big Brother, As long as he doesn't end up shagging Ronnie Wood's 21 year old ex girlfriend, who had the personality of a packet of white rice.

Did I mention I like cheesy music? I LOVE this song big time!

ANYWAY . . . when you decide you want to spend a few days hiding away . . . for whatever reason . . . what are YOUR essential items?

Friday, 8 January 2010

2010 SO FAR . . .

So we've had a week of 2010 so far. And so far . . . I ain't impressed. 2010 officially sucks.

Being back at work has sucked.

Putting off plans THREE DAYS IN A ROW for a grocery delivery that NEVER TURNED UP has sucked. (Mainly because I was getting three bottles of my favourite sparkling rose for fifteen quid when it normally costs nine for ONE BOTTLE. Suck ASS!!!)

Having crappy weather with perma-ice and constant minus temperatures has MAJORLY sucked. I HATE walking on ice - it hurts my muscles as I have to walk differently, and I HATE not being able to take confident strides. The thought of falling on my ass is WAAAYYYY too predominant at the moment. I don't like looking the fool...

(On a sidenote, I honestly don't remember it EVER being so cold here in my life. My hands were so cold and numb by the time I got home tonight that I was actually in agony for half an hour trying to get feeling and heat back into them. The whole "The Day After Tomorrow" scenario seems to be getting ever closer)

Today I was accused of having a flirtation with a guy ten years older than me who I see on a daily basis. I realised to my dismay it is probably true, despite the fact I don't actually FANCY the guy, and I don't believe he fancies me either. It's just my manner. Which means other people have probably noticed it and are gossiping about something that isn't true too. That also sucks.

The good points? There hasn't been much. Let's see . . . Today I got a taxi to work and turned out my driver also has a sideline in chauffeuring. He was telling me all about driving Pink around Glasgow (apparently she was much moodier before she got back together with her husband, and also she really likes the store "Cruise" in the city centre), how Elton John was friendlier than you'd imagine, Lionel Ritchie is apparently a sweetheart, and how The Saturdays weren't as hot as his son thought they were. It was an amusing ten minute ride. He also said something that I feel was slightly racist BUT really pretty complimentary at the same time. Is there such a thing??? (PS It had NOTHING to do with penis size in case you were wondering! Mind - gutter - get out of!)

Looking forward to heading to Manchester in Feb to meet some fellow bloggers and twitterers too! First time I've ever did anything like this so - eek!!! Very nervous, but I'm also mega excited at the same time.

Apart from that . . . I'm loving all the new people stopping by my blog. It's great. I love "meeting" new folk in the blogosphere and receiving all these comments from people who are new in my world . . . it's a great feeling. Once again proves that sometimes I prefer my bloggy life to my real life.

For example, the happiest I've been all week was when I found out that I'd been given a "Beautiful Blogger" award by one of my new must-reads "I'm That Kind Of Girl" One of the rules is to name interesting things about me but I can't think of anything so here are the first things that come to mind:

1) I'm not a natural blonde
2) I'm a new lover of brown contact lenses. I always KNEW I would look better with brown eyes rather than green, and now I've started wearing them, I don't want to stop.
3) I should have been born somewhere where 30 degrees celcius was more common.
4) I think people THINK I'm thinner than I actually am
5) I spent YEARS trying to get rid of my freckles using lemon juice and/or Fade Out and even if they disappeared temporarily, they always came back. I kinda like them now though.
6) In our Secret Santa last year, we all got given secret identities. I was called Prancer. When asked what I would like if money was no option, I said a years supply of sparkling rose wine. I got chocolate and a bottle of sparkling rose wine. Mission accomplished.
7) I wear skirts MUCH More than I wear jeans because they DON'T get randomly ripped up the thighs. . .

And just some more random stuff . . . since I'm decidedly low on inspiration myself . . . here are some blog posts you should maybe go check out . . . if you haven't already that is!

Andy's own sample "House Hunter's Episode"
Alexa's own account of when the good plum went slightly rotten . . .
Amy's terrible encounter with unreasonable-parent-and-child-rage
Juliana has some worthwhile points about some famous kids' stories . . .
LiLu proves exactly why TMI Thursday is HER baby
Maxie not only provides one of the best post titles I've ever witnessed, but also gives a good argument against all the hater-ade that has been doled out in the 20sb forum of late
LCT finds the snow brings out her Monica-esque side . . .
I also feel I have to mention the awesome Crissy's post at Toy With Me the week before last - about strange fetishes. Well, it made me laugh. A lot. Although you probably shouldn't read it in work!

Let's just say the people I mentioned in the above links can be the recipient of my award! Seems fair, somehow. Congrats guys!

On an unrelated note, I also read somewhere that this week was national de-lurker's week. I don't know whether that is the case but as I mentioned . . . I LOVE comments. AND I've had a crappy week. And comments cheer me up!!!

Emotional blackmail? Perhaps? I like to think (hope?) I'm pretty enough to get away with it . . .

Please drop by and say hi, okay? ;)

Thursday, 7 January 2010


You know what time it is, right??? TMI Thursday time, hosted by the rather wonderful and TOTALLY one-of-a-kind LiLu . . .

TMI Thursday

Alright, folks, you know the rules. Join us all in humiliating the crap out of yourself every Thursday by sharing some completely tasteless, wholly unclassy, “how many readers can I estrange THIS week??” TMI story about your life. Or hell, about someone else’s!

I wasn't entirely sure how TMI this tale actually was but then I remembered I'd posted a version of it on my Bebo blog a couple of years back and of my friends had private messaged me telling me I needed to stop talking about this stuff "in public". Therefore she surely considered it a TMI, right? Either way, I think it's a funny story.

Although it does make me sound like a bit of a fanny. (But, hey, you probably knew that anyway!)

When I first moved into my flatshare in July 2003, I was a bit bored. I didn't know any of my flatmates at the time and they weren't around for those first few days anyway. I had no TV. Most of my belongings were at my parents.

I DID have two large windows though, which take up most of the outside wall of my room. The curtains didn't cover them very well, so I could see into the flat across the road from me. There was always lots of guys in it, so I was very curious - although I couldn't tell if they were good looking or not! Anyway, to amuse myself, I would imagine that they were watching ME too and when it came to getting ready for bed . . . I used to TEASE them. I would stand only partially concealed by the curtain as I undressed . . . seemingly unaware that they were there . . . but I would never reveal too much. I'm not a stripper - but I'll admit I WAS being a bit of an exhibitionist. What can I say, boredom does funny things to people . . .

So after a couple of weeks of this, one night one of my flatmates made us all dinner (she was moving in with her man the next week) and I imbibed quite a bit of wine. (Believe it or not, I didn't drink a lot in those days and all the times I had been doing my little strip"tease" in front of the window . . . I had been completely sober. I know, how things change right?) After a few hours I wound my way down the hall to my room, more than ready for bed.

I could see the light was on in the flat opposite but I wasn't paying much attention. I sat down at my desk to take out my contacts, but right before I did so, I detected a movement out of the corner of my eye. And turned . . .

In the flat opposite, one of the guys was standing topless, pressed against the window staring over at me!!!!

At this point, I totally freaked out, closed the curtains as best I could, and switched off all the lights.

I never teased them again.

Perhaps I missed out on the (topless) guy of my dreams? I guess I'll never know . . .

Wednesday, 6 January 2010


So . . . it's time for the fabulous "Where in the World" Wednesday, the brainchild of the lovely Classy in Philadelphia.

The idea of WITWW is to post a picture of you in someplace in the doesn't have to be somewhere foreign or tropical. Just a picture of you somewhere that you consider traveling.

So today, I'm going to do just that. But I'm going to cheat a little and put a bit of a spin on things. It's not that I'm a rule-breaker, you understand. I just like to put my very own "Paula-stamp" on things sometimes.

So where am I today?

Ooooh, I'm in Glasgow! (Next to George Square, to be precise!)

This picture was taken by my ex on Christmas Eve 2007 (as you can see, unlike this year, 2007 did NOT feature a white Christmas - thank God for that!) - I'd had a very nice night out and as I spoke to my mum about the next day's plans, he snapped this picture of me on his phones. So the photo gives me very fond memories.

"But wait . . . " I hear you say. "Don't you LIVE in Glasgow?"

Well, yes, I do . . . but since I LOVE Glasgow, I thought why not make my contribution to WITW Wednesday this week about me in Glasgow and my love of the city?

(If this is cheating, I'm sorry!)

Now I was going to use this opportunity to do a sort of mini-guide to Glasgow, should you ever decide to pop over here. However . . . I'm not much use as a tour guide. Glasgow was once the city of culture, but it's been a while since I've been to any museums or galleries. It was also voted one of the best cities for shopping in the UK. And while I DO love my shopping, I haven't done much in a while. HOWEVER . . . one thing I DO have a bit of knowledge about are the drinking establishments in Glasgow. (Surprised?)

So, in case you ever decide to come visit, here is your handy print-out-and-keep guide to some watering holes in Glasgow you should give a whirl . . .


If you want to have a bit of a pub-crawl, then Bath Street in the city centre is probably your best bet. Some consider the bars along here for posers but I love them (mind you, I AM a poser). The majority of them are basement level bars so you might need to keep a sharp lookout if you have a specific one in mind (and watch the stairs on the way down!) but they are mainly fairly well sign-posted. My particular favourites are Bunker, where I had my 30th birthday, and Moskito, where I had my first date with F (and also where another ex told me he loved me for the first time). There's sure to be a bar to appeal to you in this street anyway!

Another poser's paradise is the Merchant City area of town - my favourite pub over that end is Metropolitan, a lovely bar which does a great range in cocktails. Not cheap, but worth having a couple of drinks there all the same!

The Social in Royal Exchange Square is also a nice place to go and the cocktails in there are damn cheap . . . and tasty. The staff can be a tad wankerish at times though; but it's the luck of the draw. I like it in there anyway as it's convenient for everywhere including one last drink before you pop for the last train/bus/subway homewards.

And if you fancy going to a place where you can act like a total eejit, dance like an idiot and no one will care, try Reflex, an eighties bar on Renfield Street (upstairs in Lakota). I absolutely ADORE going there, if only to dance away to as much Wham, Rick Astley and Billy Ocean as you like. Only problem is it closes at midnight - but then I rarely last longer than that when drunk anyway!


As a West End girl myself, I generally prefer to hang out in this area - cuts out the taxi home. There's the Lansdowne, a lovely basement bar near Kelvinbridge subway station. (It also does fab food, and there's a pub quiz on a Monday that we came runners-up in once.) Then there's the bars in Ashton Lane - my personal favourite is Vodka Wodka, where you once again can get some fab cocktails - including the Vanilla Skyy (which tastes a bit like lemon meringue pie) and the Chocolate Dream . . . which is essentially an alcoholic chocolate milkshake. (Can you tell I'm a cocktail girl?) Then there's Oran Mor, a pub/restaurant/club/venue set in a beautiful old church. (This is ESPECIALLY handy for me!)

In terms of clubs, you have the aforementioned Oran Mor and also Viper. I went to Viper once and absolutely loved it. It's pretty small but has a great atmosphere and good music.


I'm not really au fait with the south side of Glasgow unfortunately, which is the other trendy area. When I go we tend to end up in a pub called The Corona (which looks like an old man's pub but tends to also be full of a lot of younger folk) followed by The Shed. Most nights spent at The Shed are good ones in my experience, plus I once pulled a hot irish guy there, so I would definitely recommend a night out there!


For the ULTIMATE in variety, you COULD try the infamous subcrawl. Glasgow subway is basically a big circle around the city centre, west end and part of the south side - there's fifteen stops in total. So you basically buy an all day ticket, stop at every stop and pop into the nearest bar for a swift one. I've never done this myself - I don't think I could sink fifteen glasses of wine and still be ALIVE - but a lot of my friends have done it and lived to tell the tale - although they've been bloody hungover afterwards.

One day I hope to try it myself - although I WILL have to cheat!

Apart from the inevitable hangover, the only downside is a couple of the stops are in fairly dodgy areas and you may find the pub you go to is a bit . . . well, rough.

And so concludes our whistle-stop tour of where to get completely pissed in Glasgow! I hope you will bear it in mind should you ever stop by, and if you do, I hope you'll get in touch and invite me out with you!!!