Tuesday, 25 August 2009

ZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZ . . . OR NOT . ..

I need sleep but its not happening. My mind won't stop working, I can't switch it off.

I essentially got twenty minutes of uninterrupted sleep last night. Some fitful other stints of sleep but not enough to actually keep me fully functioning today. Tonight I came home, had dinner, decided that enough was enough - I would have to go to bed early. Put on my pjs, got in my bed at half eight. TV on quietly because I was not remotely sleepy. But of course, sleep wouldn't come. I tossed and turned for two and a half hours, occasionally venturing onto facebook via my phone because trying to sleep??? Oh so very boring. Eventually at eleven pm, I had to admit defeat. It's now 1.20 am, and I'm still wide awake, but tired, all at the same time.

I wish I could work out how to stop my brain from overthinking everything. The inability to sleep seems to be a symptom of this depression I currently seem to be suffering from. The inability to switch off obviously relates to my problems with other people, and how I can't figure out what is going on and why they treat me the way they do.

I have to try and sleep again now but I know it's not going to come easily. I know I'm going to be trying to void all the thoughts in my mind, or count sheep as a distraction, and all I'm going to be able to think about is if someone is going to stick to their word, the text they sent me tonight. If I should push it, if I should back off, if I should simply give up and call it a day and cut my losses. I don't want to. But the lack of sleep is making me feel slightly crazy. More emotional, more highly strung. And now n top of everything else, I'm stressing about the fact I can't sleep! Which makes it even HARDER to do so!!!

It's a Catch-22 situation alright.

Please give me all the positive thoughts you can spare. That I can get a normal (for me!) sleeping pattern going again, and that I can get the other stuff resolved too. I'd really appreciate it.

And I promise to try and be a bit more upbeat in my next post. Right now, I blame the fatigue...

9 comments:

  1. *cuddles*

    Tomorrow if you have time and a couple of pounds to spare, you haul your fine ass along to the crystal & candle shop - you know which one I mean.

    Get an Amethyst and a Rose Quartz. Calming, helps with mental stress and insomnia... they'll help boost the positive feelings you're needing, along with the happy thoughts being sent to you too :)

    I wouldn't suggest it if I didn't think it'd help - I've only just realised I'm more laidback and strangely content these days because I've had a couple of crystals under my pillow at night.

    Worth a shot if nothing more.

    We can talk more tomorrow xXx

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  2. I feel for you. I have been trying to sleep all day but to no avail. I posted a blog about it and then saw you'd done the same. Wishing you lots of Zzzz's!

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  3. Hey..
    You don't know me :p, but I thought I'd share some wonderful wee thoughts with you, to try and cheer you up and make you all warm inside and maybe sleep.

    Think of old couples holding hands.. the excitement when you meet someone you really 'connect with'... big mugs of coffee in small café's on cold days..

    etc

    Maybe treat yourself to a few wee spa-esque goodies? Turn off your phone, go for a long, hot bubbly bath with a glass of wine, followed by your favourite movie and a box of chocolates?

    Just try and think of yourself

    xxx

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  4. I have issues sleeping too :(

    I like the idea of a warm bath with a good book and a glass of wine. Always relaxing!

    Try the sleepy-time tea too, it actually seems to help me a lot!

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  5. I have full on insomnia and when i asleep i get night terrors so im feeling for you.

    Try and get hold of some melatonin, basically jet lag tablets. Works wonders for me and no 'hangover' like sleeping tablets!

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  6. I get bad insomnia-half a glass of chardonnay and a Tylenol 3 works wonders for me. Make your own sleepytime cocktail of choice. It'll be interesting trying.

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  7. poor thing! Judging by your post, it looks as if a lot of the problem is things going on in your daily life- as an outsider i would suggest talking to someone to help figure it all out, and hopefully sleep better!

    Good luck!

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  8. Welcome to my life, my trick to sleep is make myself super tired or drink hot mil / hot tea. :)

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  9. B always says I "give up on sleep too easily". I'm sorry but if it's after 6am and I wake up... I'm just up. It sucks, but it is what it is.

    Feel better!

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