Anyway, when I got to work today, I clocked that the bags of cookies were still sitting there. Momentarily I thought perhaps it was time we chucked them out, given they had been sitting there for four days now. But it totally slipped my mind until one of my colleagues picked up the bag of Toffee Crisp cookies, took one out, examined it meditatively, and then popped it in his mouth.
"Still tastes good," was his diagnosis.
I grimaced. "But they've been sitting there for days."
He glanced at the bag and nodded in confirmation. "Use by date is the 9th January."
"Okay, so if you collapse, we'll know why," I concluded.
He looked at me in confusion for a minute and I wondered what I had said that was so wrong. Then he started laughing. "Oh, I misheard you there," he said.
Apparently, he'd thought I said "If you get crabs, we'll know why."
So, just to make something clear . . . it's unlikely that cookies will give you a sexually transmitted disease. Even ones that are past their use-by date.
It's perhaps also worth noting that cookies WON'T make you pregnant.
They MAY cause weight gain though.
Unless you eat them standing up, of course . . .
IN OTHER NEWS . . .
I've heard that's it's National Delurking Day. So feel free to leave a comment, even if you normally wouldn't!