Saturday, 21 June 2008

WHY IS IT . . .

. . . that I always feel completely compelled to reply to someone straight away???

So remember I said the other night in my inebriated state that I was going to message that guy? Well, although I never confirmed I had done it, I did. Just a casual message saying I didn't want to just request him as a friend without at least saying hi and asking how he was. The second I had done it, I totally regretted it - in much the same way I had when I originally made the friend request.

So I kept myself away from logging into facebook until last night (while also under the influence) and was amazed to find he HAD actually replied. He had said "good to hear from you!" and said he was okay and he didn't know how I'd survived work after that night we were all out, he'd just been glad to have the day off to recover.

Now I didn't know whether to reply back or not. He hadn't asked me any questions or anything, but he had said it was good to hear from me. There was no need for him to say that, I didn't expect it. Typical me though, just reading too much into things. He'd only sent the message yesterday morning so I tried to stop myself from responding straight away. But I couldn't help myself. I tried to continue the conversation. Not gonna check for a couple of days to see if there is any response though because, if he DOES respond, I really don't want to reply straight away this time. Also, I don't know for definite if he WILL respond.

Hmmm, why is it so hard to know whether I should be BOTHERING trying to keep in contact, or whether it just isn't worth it? He didn't HAVE to reply, I send messages on facebook quite often which don't get responded to. AND (why do I keep focussing on this???) he DID say it was good to hear from me.

The old neurotic me rears it's ugly head once again . . .

13 comments:

  1. Is it so bad to reply straight away though?

    I never understood the waiting rule...how long are we supposed to wait? How long is too long?

    Can't we just reply straight away instead of being swamped by these games?

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  2. Oestrebunny - I know what you mean, but I barely even KNOW this dude, don't wanna scare him!!!

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  3. I don't think too much harm can come from replying :) just act as though it's an instant conversation. You'd be replying immediately then... :)

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  4. Play it cool... at least for the period of the weekend! That is my advice...

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  5. l.c.t. - good point!

    girl with the mask - too late, i responded in the early hours of this morning! but this time i'm not going to check facebook for AT LEAST four or five days. That way if he DOES reply, i won't know straight away and therefore won't be trying to resist the impulse NOT to play it cool. Oh, I don't even know if that sentence made sense . . .

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  6. I guess whats done is done now.... and who knows, maybe he thinks you're entirely awesome and sitting behind his computer screen desperately awaiting your reply ? :)

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  7. i think we have to remember that guys are quite simple- he wouldnt of replied if he didnt want some sort of contact.

    Go for it!

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  8. amy - ha ha, i wish! :)

    kimberlie - i suppose that's true. but then maybe he just didn't want to be rude especially since we have a mutual friend (although as far as i know, the mutual friend doesn't know me and his friend are in contact).

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  9. I think sometimes we overanalyze things....notice I say we because I'm just as bad. I would just go with the flow. Like someone above said act like the conversation just came natural and next time just let it come naturally.

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  10. Yup, I DEFINITELY overanalyse eveything, no two ways about it!

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  11. it depends on the flow of the convo on how fast I reply. I usually leave it overnight before I write back.

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  12. I'm the same way! i always want to reply right away...but then I start thinking I shouldn't. Then I just beat myself up over it forever. It sucks.

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  13. Chele - I wish I had that kinda willpower! Funnily enough, I find it easier to not repond immediately to my female friends than I do to males. Perhaps because I don't feel the need to play it cool with friends, I therefore don't feel like I have to respond immediately. Hmm, fucked up or what???

    Maxie - yep, it sucks being female sometimes, doesn't it? That being said, the only thing I would like about being a dude would be that I could pee standing up - what an awesome ability that would be to have . . . :(

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