Wednesday, 2 March 2016


Ah . . . false eyelashes . . .

 I love 'em.

Few beauty items make me feel more feminine and pretty, and without the need to spend half a day layering up the mascara. One day last week I had a night out after work so decided to buy my first pair in a good few months and I felt like my eye make-up just looked more polished and popped (not out of my head or anything, that would be weird!) - but they do have their downsides too.

Apologies . . . I didn't have a false eyelashes picture. But the fact I've taken a picture of my mascara wand instead ultimately sums up the whole post. You'll see. (It's sort of accidentally a metaphor . . .)


  • When you fuck them right up merely upon application . . .
So you've just blended your eyeshadow to perfection, like in a way you have never managed before. Seriously . . . you actually feel like you could be the long-lost (and chronologically impossible) lovechild of Michaelangelo and Bobbi Brown and you now have the Sistine Chapel Ceiling equivalent of eyelids. But one tiny slip of the finger or tweezers and you can completely ruin the effect while trying to glue those lashes on. It's like Eyelash Russian Roulette every bloody time.

  • When they make you look like you're falling asleep in meetings . . .
Is it just me who feels like false eyelashes weigh your eyes down? I was in a meeting last week and every time I blinked my eyelids felt heavier and heavier. I started to dread each and every blink as each time my eyelids shut it was like I had mini dumbbells providing resistance to opening them once again. It made it harder and harder to maintain eye contact when I felt like I looked like I was fighting sleep. I really really wasn't. My eyelids were just wrestling my falsies!

  • When you feel like one is starting to fall off . . .
Do you take it off altogether and attempt stick it back on, risking the aforementioned Sistine Chapel eyelids? Do you try and somehow glue the part falling off back onto your eyelid without sticking your eyes together? Do you just leave it and hope for the best, while trying not to blink too much? It's quite the conundrum! Seriously, what the hell do you do?

  • When you lose them . . .
You're meant to be able to re-use most false eyelashes. Which is great as they aren't bloody cheap, are they? However, in theory, you will lose one of the lashes immediately after taking them off. Or both of them. Or the glue (which literally holds the whole concept of false eyelashes together!) . . . oh yes, I tend to find that any lashes I buy rarely get an outing more than once.

  • When you find them again . . .
"Oh . . . wait . . . it's that false eyelash I misplaced a week ago."
Enough said.

  • When you take them off . . .
And have to go back to regular eyelashes with five thousand layers of mascara. And it's just not the same. Stupid regular eyelashes!!!!

Can anyone else identify? And am I missing any other downsides? Feel free to share!


  1. Ive only recently started using false eyelashes but I wear glasses and I haven't found any what don't hit of them each time I blink yet, so annoying x

    1. I have that problem too! I just use the natural ones by Eylure because they're not TOO long so you don't get the "lashes hitting your glasses" thing!

      Wicked North

  2. I've never tried false lashes, I can imagine that they're a nightmare to get on 🙈 I might try in future!


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