Monday, 5 September 2011

REJECTION 101 . . .

Last Friday night, I went out for dinner with one of my friends. It was meant to be dinner and a couple of drinks and an earlyish night. Instead it ended up turning into an out-until-virtually-closing-time kinda night. Fair enough. The fact I woke up on my bathroom floor is irrelevant to this post.

Over the course of the night, we popped into a rather sleazy pub in Sauchiehall Street where my friend assured me the drinks were cheap. We each got a Kopparberg, which we quickly regretted, as there was a lot of drinking in one and we had quickly realised the place was like a cattle market and were desperately drinking as fast as we could so we could escape without wasting out money. Soon enough, a guy was next to us trying to chat us up.

Not particularly successfully. He was clearly drunk, obviously a sleazy bastard and EXTREMELY self important. He kept making reference to the fact that he lived in Malta normally and was only back in his homeland for the Scotland game the following day. I think he thought the Malta thing would impress us. We were polite enough but were clearly not interested in him. My friend is taken and I'm . . . well, we all know my story.

As we made our excuses and went to leave, he said "I'd like to say one last thing before you go." He pointed at my friend. "I can tell," he slurred at her, "that you are much younger than HER." He pointed at me to emphasise his last word. He looked back at my friend. "I think you're in your twenties and that you" he pointed at me "are in your thirties."

Now, seriously, was there any need for that? First of all, my friend is a good bit younger than me, but we don't look THAT far apart in age. For another, a guy SHOULDN'T mention a girl's age, unless she brings it up. And, as far as I can, he was doing it because he thought it would bother me.

It DID bother me. Not because I think I LOOK my age. I know I don't. I got ID'd in Waitrose buying a bottle of wine the other day, ffs. But I don't particularly think it was his place to comment.

As far as I can see, he through this out-of-nowhere bullet at me because he was pissed off I wasn't interested. Now I could be wrong, but this isn't the first time something like this has happened. It seems that some guys can't actually handle being rejected, even if they haven't been DIRECTLY rejected, and they then need to say something rude to make up for it. In fact, as I type this, I realise I read a similarly themed post by a fellow blogger just the other week . . . it isn't just me his happens to!

Have you ever had this happen to you, or saw it happen to someone else? Do you think there's actually any need for it? Just deal with the rejection - or go bitch about it behind the person's back! But don't go drag them down just to make yourself feel better . . .


  1. First of all...what a total and utter douche! He was clearly annoyed that you weren't falling all over yourself to bag his nasty self.

    Secondly, I've had that sort of thing happen. If you aren't interested, you're clearly a bitch or a lesbian, it seems. Really, we just have these little things called taste and standards.

  2. Wtf? You should have punched that d-bag in the balls.

  3. For the most part, guys never seem to pay much attention to me. They seem to adore my friends and when my friends turn them down, they'll sometimes then turn to me. And sorry honey, but I ain't no one's second best!

    Once, I went to a bar with a friend. She found a guy she liked there and I don't remember why but for some reason I was supposed to go talk to him for her. So I went up and explained that my friend was interested. It turns out the dude was married but had just discovered the wife had been cheating on him with someone he knew. I went back and told my friend it wasn't going to work out and to move on to someone else.

    This same guy kept coming up to me several times during the night to further explain why he couldn't date my friend. He was really drunk and I'm not sure why he found it necessary to continue coming up to my table but he did, up until the bar closed. My friend got jealous and thought that I was trying to take her new crush away from her. I kept telling her no, that wasn't the way it was at all. I couldn't get this guy to leave me alone and the more he came up to me, the madder she got. It didn't help that he wouldn't talk to her at all.

    I'm not sure why I just told you that story. I'd forgotten all about it as it happened forever ago. I guess just reading this post brought it all back up. Never did see the guy again.

  4. Yes it is totally unnecessary! I blogged a few months ago about a guy who hit on me & I told him I was engaged & then he said I looked pregnant & my wedding was a shotgun marriage! What the eff?! I guess calling me fat made him feel better about the rejection. So lame.

  5. There are so many guys who do this!! And they wonder why they're not such a good catch...I mean, duh!

    I've even heard of pick up artists using that sort of line to get a girl's attention...gross. It would never work on me - ever!

    I've had sleazy older guys hit on me and when I've said I'm not only married but NOT interested (even if I'm being polite) they go off on a rant and swear at me or huff off. So screwed up!!

  6. First of all - what a freaking douche!
    Secondly - yea, i've seen that happen a few times. Something like " Who'd wana f**k you anyway ? " or " Whatever - your friend is prettier anyway ". Boys ( and notice i didnt say " men, because real men wouldnt do it ) can be so stupid...

  7. god, what a complete and utter douche! Repulsive. xx ps - following you now!

  8. Wow, what a jerk!

    To the readers of this blog: I have met the lovely blogger in real life. I don't know how old she actually is, but she most definitely does not look like she's in her thirties. I'd say early twenties. Just for the record.

  9. Oh f**k yes, I've seen this sort of a-hole MANY times try his crap with people. If there's one thing I hate, it's people who turn hateful and spiteful when they don't get their own way. And try to hurt someone just because they didn't get it. What a douchebag. We need to come up with a perfect response to these types of idiots. Too bad kicking them in the nuts in public isn't legal. What a LOSER.

  10. ugh seriously??!! how rude! Your so right tho, if guys get rejected, they just lash out to make themselves feel better!x

  11. I would have punched him. Or would 2 guys in a week have been too much? :P


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