Wednesday, 29 June 2011


You probably know that I am, and have always been, a bit of a Facebook addict. The stalking potential of it IS fairly amazing after all. But one of the things I've not really been able to get my head around recently is this onslaught of strangely named pages that my friends have been "liking". Often they appear in my facebook feed and I just think "what the fuck? who even THOUGHT to start up that page???"

Would you care me to show you some examples of these pages/groups? Yes? Well, okay, I will!

join if you have stepped on a stair that wasn't there
(I'm sure I've been guilty of this more than once - hopefully only while inebriated - but I probably wouldn't admit to it)

Saying the entire alphabet because you can't remember what letter comes next
(I don't think I do this - but every time I phone up the helpdesk in work I have to work out my surname's letters in the phonetic alphabet in advance so I don't start saying things like "S for . . . um . . . Silly, H for . . . um . . . Honey" and have all my colleagues laugh at me. Is there a facebook page for that. Should I form it? Would you "like" it if I did?)

I'm never wrong. One time I thought I was wrong, but I was mistaken.
(Spot the deliberate - I hope - mistake in that one)

My haggis brings all the Scots to the zoo and they're like och aye the noo
(Actually, THAT is the best laugh I've had all night; I'll probably never be able to listen to "Milkshake" with a straight face again!)

(Does a parking barrier count? Oh, actually I technically DID walk into a lamppost once. Sort of. But I'm still not liking/joining!)

I did not hit you. I simply high-fived your face.
(Same thing. No?)

If U start 2 miss me remember I didn't walk away, you let me go
(I actually would kinda like the message behind this one, if it wasn't for the text speak, which negates it somewhat.)

Sticking your finger in someone's mouth when they yawn

Do you have a favourite Facebook group or page you have noticed recently that made you laugh or think "wtf?" Please, oh please, share!!! (And yes, I WILL play the "I'm ill and depressed, please cheer me up with this" guilt card . . . Oooh, perhaps THAT should be a facebook page too!!!)


  1. My ex's teenage (pregnant with baby daddy in prison*) sister provides an endless source... This week...

    1 million 'likes' and my wife has agreed to call our baby Megatron.

    Yes, Blame it on the alcohol..Because you couldn't possibly be a SLUT (the irony)

    Baa-Baa White Man Have You Any Weed? No Bud, No Bud, I Only Deal Speed.

    Join if you used to slide back & forth in the bath to make giant waves!

    How Many Votes Can This Sexy Apple Get Than Justin Beiber?

    I know I should delete her because I find myself getting angry at her dumb status updates and her joy at getting a council houes because she's 17 and pregnant and her stupidity and insolence makes my blood boil, but I don't delete her because her car crash life makes me feel better about my own.

    * what a cliche. I know.

  2. Ha that last one is more commonly known as Yawn Rape. Now you know.

    Hope you're feeling better soon lady.

  3. Hope you are starting to feel better, or at least you get to see the doctor soon so that they can help you!

    I don't have any weird pages that I like. I typically avoid liking those things b/c all they do is clog up your wall it seems. But I have seen some weird ones as well and thought WTF???

  4. I'm not on Facebook anymore, but this post about weird groups had me cracking up!

  5. The Girl is right, the last one is Yawn Rape! Introduced Rocky to that one (thankfully it didn't require me consoling him with chocolate afterwards).

    And Anonymous - I like your style. Stay FB friends with the fuck up so you look AND feel better in comparison. :D


  6. The Scottish one made me laugh so hard! Also, 'yawn rape'?? I wonder if any of these 'yawn rapers' have had a finger bitten yet...

  7. Haha this made me giggle - I've been seeing these for weeks too and there are some real gems:

    'Looking at your McDonald's burger and wondering which McSpastic threw this together.'

    'Going out for a quiet one and coming back with no pants and a new cat.'

    'Don't you just hate it when Santa uses the same wrapping paper as your mum'.

    Etcetera. Have to love some of them XD

    (By the way, what does 'och aye the noo' mean?)

  8. I've seen:

    'My Conch brings Piggy to the yard, and he's like, But Ralph's in charge.'

    'I hate it when I sleep at someone's house and wake up AGES before them'

    'Don't have phone sex you could get hearing aids'

    'I wonder what Cambridge University Netball Team abbreviate their name to?'

    'I was going to do something, then I got distracted for 5 seconds and forgot'

    I don't actually 'like' any of these pages myself but they do make me laugh!

    Blue Eyes xx


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