*Yes, could this be a title for a new mystery novel? I think so. Not sure how well it would actually SELL but hey-ho...
(Isn't it weird how my Friday posts have tended towards flatmate-related rants recently??? Just a thought...)
On Thursday night, I popped out at nine-ish (on a WORK night? Hell to the yeah!) to meet my sister for some drinks and catching up. We polished off a bottle of wine by about twenty to ten, which was the point when I informed sis we had a decision to make. Did we stay in Vodka Wodka and drink overpriced (14.95 for a bottle of rose! Probably should have stuck to the yummy cocktails but it was a wine kind of night...) wine, or nip to the shops before ten pm to get some far cheaper (but probably tastier) wine and head back to mine. We opted for option number two and headed for Iceland (frozen food store, not the country) which always has good alcohol deals (despite alcohol generally not being a form of frozen food). But the security guard on the door took one look at us, immediately realised we were there for alcohol, and warned us that the queue was fairly long and since it was only ten minutes until alcohol-buying-cutoff-time, we might not actually get served on time.
That was very nice of him, right? (Girls got to have their wine, and all that.)
So we ran across Byres Road to Oddbins instead. (We nearly got hit by a couple of cars in the process but time was running out . . . Priorities and all that!)
Which has a fairly crap collection of rose wine. At one point my sister wondered aloud if there was any sparkling rose. The only one I could see was nearly 30 quid. Ouch. That was NOT happening.
So armed with two bottles of random rose wine (seriously, Oddbins? No Blossom Hill or Echo Falls White Zin? You're killing me here.) and after picking up a takeaway pizza for my sis, we sat on my bed, gossiped, watched "Music and Lyrics" (well I say "watched" but we talked through it instead) and got drunk.
Eventually my bladder could hold no more wine. "I need to pee," I slurred.
"Me too!" Sis agreed.
For some reason, DESPITE both bathrooms being free for a change, we decided to go into the bathroom together and continue to hang out while we peed.
(My sister is pretty much the only person I can pee in front of, FYI)
The first thing I noticed when we entered the bathroom was that one of my towels had been moved.
And was pretty damp.
I hadn't showered that day (I don't shower everyday, okay??? There, I SAID it) so I knew the wet towel wasn't my doing.
Once again, some ASSHOLE had decided to just use my stuff.
Drunk me copes worse with this than sober me apparently.
I increased my personal volume by a great deal of decibels and started SCREAMING about the horrible person who had decided to use my towel. My sister, to my great delight, joined in. We didn't know who the fuck the culprit was, but we were prepared to give them hell. They would RUE THE DAY they used my towel.
Of course, since we were drunk, it didn't make much sense. For example:
Me: I CAN'T BELIEVE THEY WOULD USE MY TOWEL LIKE THAT! WHY DON'T THEY USE THEIR OWN? DON'T THEY HAVE ANY . . . SELF RESPECT???
(I meant didn't they have any respect for other people's belongings. NOT self-respect. If they'd had no self-respect they'd probably have PEED on it or something...)
ME: IT MIGHT NOT EVEN HAVE BEEN ONE OF THEM WHO DID IT. IT MIGHT HAVE BEEN ONE OF THEIR BOYFRIENDS!
SIS: EW! I WANTED TO HAVE A SHOWER IN THE MORNING BUT I DON'T WANT TO TOUCH A TOWEL COVERED IN YUCKY HAIRY MAN GERMS!
ME: IT'S OKAY, I HAVE OTHER TOWELS! BUT YEAH . . . EW! MAN GERMS ON TOWELS SUCK!
ME: I HATE THEM ALL!!! I WANT TO KILL THEM ALL! THIS IS WHY I WANT TO LIVE ALLOOOOONNNNNEEEEEEEEE!!!
SIS: MY HUSBAND STEALS MY FOOD ALL THE TIME! I WANT TO LIVE ALONE TOOOO!
(She didn't really mean that, but he DOES steal her food!)
After we'd screamed for a bit, I turned to my sister and said in a normal level of voice: "I'm not sure anyone else is in the flat."
Well it was fun while it lasted I guess . . .
But seriously, how rude is it to just use someone else's towel like that? And not even have the decency to cover it up?
My blood is boiling again just thinking about it.
I NEED TO MOVE OUT!!!