I couldn't resist revisiting my spam files, because . . . sometimes the titles are just too damn good to resist poking fun at. It would be kind of like watching someone you really hate doing something really humiliating and . . . well, not LAUGHING. So what choice items have appeared in my inbox recently? Let's see . . .
Your life will be worthwhile if your penis grows a little.
Hmmm, hate to break it to you, but that might not be true. If you have, for example, the world's tiniest one and it only grows a little, it'll still be tiny . . .
We will deliver your watch exactly where you ask
Wow, delivery to wherever you want??? What a novel concept . . . On the other hand, perhaps they know how unreliable Royal Mail is . . .
Women always accept invitations to bed from hung men.
Necrophiliacs we are not. Well, not ALL of us anyway. Oh right, wait, I get what this means now. I think if you'd preceded the "hung" with "well", it might have been a little clearer . . .
Enlarging your machine is the best way to get your ex back.
I'm assuming they are referring to genitalia again. Personally I'd prefer a bigger TV or something to getting my ex back. Maybe that's just me though . . . ?
A watch speaks about its owner.
If my watch is speaking behind my back, I will NOT be happy. Unless it's complimentary, then I might forgive it . . .
Your thingy will get stiffy
Every man would give up his brain for a decent size.
Ah, is that what happened to the male of the species? (Just kidding, fellas!)
Make your banana huge
They're selling us fruit via spam now??? ;)
You can be ugly and stupid as long as your shaft is big.
I must have somehow missed the memo on that one . . .