So what am I referring to, I hear you ask? (Well, technically speaking, I can't hear you ask, since I'm sitting in a room myself. So either it's the little voices in my head, or I'm just imagining what you're thinking right now. Anyway, I digress.)
I'm talking about people who can't seem to walk in a straight line.
And not because they're drunk. I know that would be the obvious reason (hell, it's the reason why I can't usually walk in a straight line) but it's weirder than that.
I've noticed this strange phenomenon after years of test studies (ie. having people almost walk into me on many an occasion) - some people cannot seem to walk in a straight line while doing the one of the following things . . .
2) Speaking on the phone
Both confuse me greatly. I mean, after the physical act of lighting a cigarette, surely you can watch where you are going and walk at the same time. Surely after the act of locating a number in your phone and putting it to your ear, you can watch where you're going and . . . you see where I'm going here? . . . walk at the same time. Why is it apparently so difficult for certain people to do this?
I see it happen so often. I'll be walking along the street and the person in front of me, who was previously walking in a relatively straight time, suddenly starts veering all over the place. Instantly I wonder "cigarette or phone?" It's always one or the other. I don't understand it. I mean, I can send a text message and still walk in a straight line. Surely that takes far more coordination than smoking/walking or talking/walking? No?
Today I was walking home and saw a woman coming towards me and veering back and forward a bit. "Cigarette or phone?" I thought straight away, squinting in the darkness (I only had one contact lens in and my eyesight is more fucked at night anyway) to see if I could tell from a distance.
Eventually I saw she was on the phone while smoking a fag and not walking in a straight line.
A true multi-tasker.
The first thought that struck me as I tried to work out how to get past her without a direct collision was that I had thought perhaps doing both things would cancel everything out. That if you smoke, talk and walk, perhaps it all balances out. Maybe you would walk in an extremely straight line.
Secondly, given that she was barely pausing for breath during her conversation, I wondered what the point was of her actually having a lit cigarette in her hand at all. Not that I asked. (The lit cigarette could have been used as a weapon . . . )
Sometimes I wonder if I'm imagining things. But it's happened waaayyyyy too often for it to just be a coincidence. Has anyone else noticed this? Or is it just me???