The setting - Crown bar, Belfast, last month
(Me, M and A are enjoying our drinks when a random stranger approaches us)
Random stranger: Do you happen to know what the Irish version of the name "James" is?*
(We look at each other blankly for a moment. Then . . . )
Random stranger: (looking doubtful) Er - okay. Thanks. (walks away)
M: Paula, what were you THINKING?
A: You can't just MAKE UP names!
M: Why did you tell her that was the Irish version of James?
Me: (confused) Erm - cos it is . . . I think.
A: No, I don't think it is.
Me: Well, do YOU know what it is?
A: Eh - no, I don't.
Me: It IS! It's pronounced "Shay-mus" but you spell it S-E-A-M-U-S. (They both still look doubtful, so much so that I start to doubt myself). Honestly, it's true!
M: Well, how do you KNOW that?
Me: Um, I don't actually know.
By which point they almost had me convinced I HAD just made it up. So I googled it on my phone . . . and I was right! Have absolutely NO IDEA how I knew this but I did.
The point of this anecdote? Isn't it obvious???
I really AM a font of useless information.
(As long as you ask me something I know the answer to, that is . . . )
*I wonder why she wanted to know this. There wasn't any pub quiz going on...