Spotted outside St Enoch Shopping Centre earlier today . . .
Dodgy looking woman dressed in tight fitting jeans and an ill fitting black leather crop top which tied at the back and illicited many "oh my god, what the FUCK is she wearing?" comments from passersby. Not only did she have slightly too much of a muffin top to pull it off, but her fake-tanned skin had more than a hint of the "just been on the sunbed and suffering" look to it.
But I would have just called it bad fashion sense had the following not happened . . .
She wandered in front of us to the top of the stairs overlooking St Enoch Square, where several workies were sitting. She is probably the type of person who would have got comments from this type normally but she slightly pre-empted that by posing in what I assume she thought was a seductive way and then shouting out:
"WOOOOAHHH, GUYS, CHECK ME OUT!!! HOW HOT AM I???"
before executing a twirl for them.
(Bear in mind this is Glasgow at the rush hour - there's people aplenty about.)
Guys didn't know what to say. Me and my friend were trying hard not to piss ourselves laughing as she walked away muttering to herself "Thank God! I've got a job FINALLY! I can't believe it, I can relax now."
I can't help but wonder what kind of job. Judging by her behaviour and the way she was dressed though, I'm gonna have to opt for the stripper/lapdancer combo . . .
And on an entirely unrelated subject (apart from the fact she's perhaps a "lady who be livin' it up") I've been thinking about this song all day for some reason so here you are . . .