Monday, 16 June 2008


All the fishes are dead now, apparently. The "murderers" included. My friend says, at this point, it's almost a relief. . . .


Waking up yesterday morning and going through my sent messages (you know, just to check I hadn't sent anything stupid, as most of us are wont to do when we're drunk), I was kinda surprised to discover a text I'd sent to one of my friends the previous night saying "Hi D, I have something to tell you. I'm pregnant . . . with triplets." Even more weirdly, I'd sent it to the friend I was out with that night.

After a momentary panic, I remembered we'd been talking about one of my friend's workmates, who is one of those "anything you have done, I have done better" types and tends to try to pass other people's stories off as her own. My text was a reminder to my friend she was going to tell her colleague that her friend was pregnant with triplets . . . and see what happened next. Watch this space!!!


Yesterday's conversation with our upstairs neighbours (we befriended them by drunkenly shouting out the window to them as they were coming into the flat then they decided when they got upstairs to lean out the bay window in their front room and try to have a conversation with us as my flatmate's friend was having a fag).

Guys upstairs: Wow, a fag. Give us a puff.
FF: Er - no!
Guys upstairs: Go on, hand it up to us!
FF: Who do you think I am, Inspector Gadget?
Guys upstairs: Go Go Gadget Arms!!

I'm thinking they may have been stoned because they then started shouting "Neighbours, neighbours!" out the window everytime they wanted to chat. Ever heard of knocking on the door?


This morning, I meet two of my flatmates in the kitchen. Flatmate Number Two has her sister with her . . .

Flatmate 2 (apologetically) Hope you don't mind P, but I borrowed a bottle of water out of your fridge.
Me: Oh right, okay (wondering since when do I keep bottled water in the fridge?)
F2: It's just that my sister doesn't like tap water. I hope that's okay.
Me: (still bemused) No no, don't worry about it, it's not a problem.

Five minutes later to Flatmate 1 . . .
Me: I don't buy water and keep it in my fridge.
F1: What do you mean?
Me: The only bottle of water in my fridge was one I bought and drank a week or two ago and then refilled . . . with tap water.

Apparently F2's sister, who hated tap water so much, couldn't tell the difference...


And last but not least, located the guy on facebook and tried to add him as a friend. He hasn't bitten. Oh well . . . Plenty more fish in the sea (and not in my friend's bowl, that's for sure!)


  1. Ah I loved Inspector Gadget and finding the flatmate tap water thing very amusing!

  2. I don't think ANYONE realizes that tap water is really tap water when it's disguised in a water bottle!

  3. Tap water...funny.
    I hate waiting for the facebook friend request thing with boys, I mean is it a power thing? Do they wait on purpose or do they just not like us? Sheesh..

  4. hahaha the tap water thing, too funny. I know people like that...water is water man. I love cold tap water.

  5. When your tap water tastes like dirt, you can tell the difference!!

    We have a filter jug though, only drinking bottled would just get too costly.

  6. I love tap water snobs, they make me laugh.

  7. Hahaha totally love the tap water bit!! it's so true!! I've snapped many a "bottled water only" snob with that.

  8. The triplet thing is good! I just wanna know how far this girl is going to go to one-up you ( or should i say, yur friends " friend " ) ? She's not going to go into turkey baster territory is she ?


You wanna leave me a comment? Come on, you know you want to really . . . ;)